Sunday, November 15, 2009

Grand Theft Equine - Chapter Twenty-Five: Hold All Bets

Previous chapters are available on the sidebar.


Cailen parked across the street from Hannah’s house, and Brie, who'd been standing vigil on the front porch, jogged over to meet her. Foreign to form, Cailen threw her arms around Brie and immobilized her with a cloying embrace.

“Pretend to console me,” she whispered. The desperation that overrode her normal voice was dead genuine, but Brie still wrestled like a taunted tiger. “Damn it, Brie, I need you to listen to me. Stop squirming. Sassy Rainier has played her final card.” The ferocity drained from Brie's body long enough for Cailen to say, “The woman is truly insane and may have someone watching us, so hold on and pretend to comfort me.”

Brie cupped Cailen’s neck with one hand and ran the other palm up and down her back. “This feels weird, plus you've been sweating, plus Hannah can probably see us from inside the house. Okay, what has Farms done this time?”

After a condensed rendition of the afternoon's diversions, Cailen ended with, “Your whole body is tight with rage. Can you walk back to the house without showing that, if I let you go? And, remember, no telling Hannah until you can draw her out of the house.”

Wide-eyed, Brie asked, “Will it be safe to speak in the car?” While truly concerned for Penny, she could not entirely dampen an underlying tingle of intrigue. Besides, with the four of them against Sassy Rainier, surely no harm would come to Pennington’s Lass.

“I’d be afraid of the car. You are obviously where I'd run to, so we have to consider your house and vehicles as leaky as ours. For Penny's sake, we have to be overly paranoid.”

“I understand. You can let go now, just stand back and watch me become the most soothing, supportive friend the world has ever seen.”

“Don’t over do it, Brie. This is no joke.”

*****

From deep within the fruit and vegetable section of a nearby supermarket, under cover noise of mist jets hissing all around—that tingle of intrigue had blossomed to full vibration—Brie filled Hannah's hands, which were too expressive to be trusted to remain low key, with delicate cherry tomatoes as she began recounting Cailen's story. After Hannah had traveled the emotional route from swerving anger, steeply up to towering indignation, and on through to a macadamized, relentless determination to save Penny, Brie bagged up the tomatoes.

Hannah pretended to examine some peaches for firmness. “This is deadly serious, you know. Joan and Cailen must be half out of their minds.”

“I know that.” Brie frowned at the fuzzless peaches, but they were all the store was offering.

“Then why do I detect a definite whiff of titillation in and about your person?”

The last time Brie had tried to hide anything from Hannah was that final attempt to convince her it was unwise for their relationship to turn sexual. It hadn't worked then either.

Brie came close to flapping her arms to protest the hint of censure in Hannah's words, but recovered the proper attitude by re-routing them above her head and dabbing for an edge at a roll of filmy plastic bags. “There may be a microscopic amount of fascination, I admit that. But, Hannah, our house might be bugged? Our cars could be bugged? Somebody is probably tailing us right this very minute? What’s not to be fascinated about?”

Hannah thought, And you seriously try to trump me sometime with the four-years-older card. Unbelievable, Brisada. She said, “Joan and Cailen's dilemma, for one thing. And Penny's life.”

“Look, Sassy is stupid. We are smart. She can’t win this. Absolutely nothing bad is going to happen to that filly. The part that makes me want to strangle Farms is how torn up Cailen will be in the meantime, and Joan too.”

Hannah settled three peaches into the bag Brie had split free. They paid and made tracks for home, where Hannah placed her call to Joan with the pre-arranged offer to go over there. It was accepted and the note bearing Cailen's plan was passed on.

Actually, the scheme had been Brie's conception. While doing up their horses the following morning, Jimmy would overhear Brie and Hannah insisting that Joan go with them to Cinda's house for some margarita therapy. Nobody on the listening end could possibly know who Cinda was or where she lived, so Sassy's thugs would have to tail closely and they’d have no chance to place a bug at Cinda's house in time. Joan, Hannah, and Brie would each take a separate vehicle and run a personal errand first. Brie thought that a nice added touch for tying up enemy manpower. The spirit of the outing would be aimed, ostensibly, at commiserating with Joan over Cailen's mysterious behavior. They were assuming that the office, as well as perhaps some strategically chosen stalls, were being monitored, but it wouldn't hurt to make sure Jimmy also heard the plans.

Smuggling Cailen into the pow-wow was the hard part. To do it, Cailen had to actually spend the night at Cinda's, and they had to make certain anyone who might be watching believed she was still at Brie's. It was dark when Hannah got back with Joan's return note, which basically said the plan seemed sound. Hannah smuggled Cailen, by way of side entrances blocked from view by closely adjoining privacy fence gates, next door to the apartment of a close friend. Paul agreed to escort Cailen, who would be concealed like a needy girlfriend in the protective hollow of his thick arm and aided by a three-house distance from the nearest streetlight, from his front door to his car. And he would drop her off at Cinda's. Once there, Cailen was on her own, but Brie insisted Cinda wouldn't mind helping, what with technically owing Cailen a car and all.

*****

Rain, as forecast, did move into the Ohio River Valley late the next morning. A mile-high glob of gray muck had draped its blubbery self over Louisville, and showed no intention of crawling off by the time they were to leave for Cinda's. The entire party was free of afternoon chores, though, thanks to Car.

The night before, Cailen had found Cinda's cramped, noisy house strained to the dust-bunnied tip of every corner by those six lives elbowing for space within it. Cailen had made it there at seven o’clock, and although a couch in the living room had optimistically been designated as her place to sleep, the TV was, after all, in there too. So keeping the kids out was, in their mother's eyes, unfair and impractical. Even if Cinda had ordered the room off-limits to the kids, Cailen doubted they could have been made to stay out. The little things ripped and rolled and ran all over the place. Like sand duteously sifting itself into beachwear, they endlessly seeped from under chairs, oozed from behind the couch, and ricocheted through doorways.

Digna wasn't so bad, but she was the oldest, at seven, and did exhibit some semblance of a life beyond staring wide-eyed at the stranger and practicing self-hypnosis in front of the tube. She'd spent most of the evening serenely working on homework. In spite of a sinking preoccupation over Penny, Cailen found a slim measure of energy to wonder if she might be a little partial to Digna because of her namesake and the birth drama, but decided that no, the girl truly did seem to have more sense than the others, or maybe seven was a less annoying age, who knew?

The children had finally gone to bed around eleven, after being allowed to stay up to say goodnight to their daddy when he got home from his night job cashiering at a convenience store. But even after they went to bed, the TV had to be left blaring because the creepiest one, Blaine, who had stared at Cailen for two solid hours, all the while wetly sucking his thumb, would wake up and scream bloody murder if he couldn't hear the television in the background and see its glow in the hallway.

Things calmed down some in the morning. The kids’ daddy Harrison, after only five hours sleep, was up and gone to the track. A little later, Digna and the one just smaller than her went to school. That left the baby, who was imprisoned in her high chair, and the irrepressible Blaine, whose age gave him the benefit of a school-free schedule and unfettered access to Cailen. He brought his Pop-Tart and chocolate milk into the living room so he could feast his eyes upon her while he ate.

When Joan, Brie and Hannah crowded awkwardly into the tiny living room shortly before two that afternoon, their arrival felt like nothing short of rescue. So much so that Cailen almost didn't mind for once that Hannah had come along. Cinda kept calling Joan Ms. Caulder at first and the kids wouldn't let them be alone to talk. At least Brie was serving as a magnet, with Blaine and the baby clinging to her, which temporarily stanched the perpetual motion effect.

Cinda sternly ordered the children to vacate the living room. They paid no attention, so she glanced sideways at Joan with a contrite shrug as she suggested, "Why don't you all go to the kitchen? I can at least close you up in there for some privacy."

The kitchen, though wanting for space and crying for light, was an improvement, and the bump of the knobless door behind Cinda marked the first opportunity for everyone to speak freely since about the same time yesterday.

Joan took stock and, not pleased at finding a tight jaw and darkened eyes, she folded herself around Cailen. "You didn't sleep at all, did you?"

"That's not important. The main—"

Blaine tumbled through the door on a long, low giggle, proud of himself for breaching the barricade and looking for some fun. Hannah couldn't help smiling, Cailen was disgusted, and Joan regarded him like an organism she'd only go close to if there were a stick handy to poke at it with. His face reddened from strain, centrifuge and joy as Brie caught him up and whirled his stubby body in looping arcs through the air, expertly clearing his head of the closely arranged fixtures. When his laughter got so hard and went so deep it ceased to produce noise, Brie stopped the ride and let him off.

"Do it again, Aunt Brie!"

In a cold trembly voice, fingers flexing creepy-crawly fashion, she mewled, "I am not your Aunt Brie."

This cracked him up. "Who are you?"

Brie flapped his shirtfront up and blew raspberries all over his tender bulb of a stomach. "I'm the belly monster."

Tickled to immobilization, he begged her to stop. When she did, finally, she fixed his shirt and asked him to please go to the other room so they could talk.

"I want you to play with me, Aunt Brie."

She knew how to get rid him. Using that same ghosty voice, "I am not Aunt Brie, I am not the belly monster."

Thinking he'd won, he taunted, "Who are you? I'm not scared."

"The butt monster." And she reached, deliberately ineffectual, for his waistband.

Taking a firm hold on his pants in front of the three lady strangers, Blaine streaked for the door. Two seconds later, he put one hand back through, beckoning Brie with a crooking finger.

Brie was apologetic. "One minute, guys, I promise. After this, he'll behave, I swear." She was back in less than the minute.

Everybody was seated around the battered red plastic, chrome-legged kitchen table, so she sat too, ready for business. Joan gave her a vacant look. "Okay, before we get started, what did he want?"

"Blaine? He wanted to tell me that Cailen kept staring at him last night. He wants to marry you, Cailita."

"Look, Brie, I know you love these kids, but my ability to be amused by them evaporated fourteen or fifteen hours ago."

Hannah, a woman crazy about kids, had been captivated by Brie on a brand new level, watching her with Blaine. She was also a woman who'd had to tie Thunder to the wall that morning. Neither of these womanly elements cared for Cailen's tone and she snarled, "Brie was merely answering Joan's question."

Elbows on the table, eyes shut, Cailen massaged her temples for a moment. She was about to attempt something conciliatory when Joan broke in.

"Look, we've all been thrust into an outlandish, frightening drama here. Let's not satisfy any of Sassy's wishes, including the one that we not stick together." Nobody offered argument to that, so Joan went on. "We've all had time to ponder Sassy's assault. Let's try to piece together the most elegant response, if there is one."

Brie posed her best idea. "Didn't you tell me a couple of years ago that there's a clause in your contract with Sassy about not selling horses to the killers as long as you’re able to place them with new owners?"

Nodding without looking hopeful, Joan cleared up the point. "I double checked the wording on that last night. It only applies to horses that have raced under the Caulder colors. Penny went back home unraced, so the clause doesn't protect her."

"Too bad, it would have been satisfying to stomp on her with a technicality."

Hannah tried another avenue. "What about the Humane Society?"

Brie shook her head. "Totally powerless in this situation. By virtue of ownership, Sassy has full legal rights to sell Penny, even to the killers."

More dead end ideas only strengthened the case for Cailen's resolution, which was bold, decisive and criminal. And she dreaded Joan's reaction to it. When she'd just about decided the time had come to suggest it, Joan beat her to the punch.

"Unless one of us has a brainstorm in the next few minutes," Joan consulted her watch, "I'm afraid there's no way to guarantee Penny's safety short of committing a felony. We have to steal her from Rainier Farms, and soon."

All the bunched up muscles in Cailen's shoulders eased and she gathered Joan's hands from the opposite side of the table. "That's absolutely our only real choice. I was so afraid you'd object."

"No, I don't object, as long as we minimize the exposure."

Suspicious of that, Brie swung around to face Joan. "Explain what 'minimize the exposure' will mean."

Joan was far too accommodating for Brie's liking. "All it means is that apparent responsibility shouldn't be spread out among us, but should be concentrated. Now, we can pull this off without getting caught, I really believe that. But in the unlikely event something goes wrong, if blame can only be assigned to me, then we've still got the advantage that Sassy wouldn't want to see me put in jail." Joan fluttered her eyelashes. "She's sweet on me, you know."

Three heads shook vehemently and they all voiced objections at once, overlapping to near incoherence but getting across the theme that sacrificing Joan was not an option. It took ten full minutes for Joan to bat away their protests and drive home the logic of her reasoning. That done, all they need figure out was exactly how to extricate a half-ton, field-high filly from the steel, stone, and electronic embrace of Rainier Farms' security system.

But first there was a more human issue Joan wanted to bring to the table. "Something that has nagged at me since this all began is Sassy's certainty that a threat against Penny would devastate Cailen. That much regard for an animal is outside Sassy's emotional range, so what gave her the idea to use it in the first place?"

Laying her hands out palms up on the marred tabletop, Cailen reiterated, "She didn't show a hint of doubt, not a trace."

"Surely such confidence in her power over you came from somewhere outside Sassy's personal experience." A look filled with meaning flittered between Joan and Brie. It said Brie, if you know what I'm getting at, would you please be the one to say it first?

Brie did know what she was getting at, and it made perfect sense. "Cailita, Lara already helped Sassy once. It seems possible to me she's the one who thought up this whole mess. I mean, Lara knows your heart when it comes to horses, she also knows from experience how much you'll give up for something you love and, sorry to say it baby, but she has never hesitated to use that against you."

Until that moment, Cailen had regarded Lara's offensiveness as an ingredient of the muddle they'd made of their relationship, something spawned by that, but lacking independence from it. Beneath the selfishness and manipulation Lara had learned to wield so effectively against Cailen, there had remained an unconscious assumption that the literal, decent Lara still existed. This notion that self-sustaining treachery flourished as much at Lara’s core as within Sassy Rainier was something new to digest.

Cailen directed a question to Joan. "Do you think Lara's helping with this?"

"I do."

Cailen sat up straighter. "Okay, then, good to know. Just another parameter. We need to know the parameters, what all we're up against. So, let's hammer this out. I guess the first step is to go over everything we know about that security setup. Brie, you first. I realize it's been a few years since you lived there, but tell us everything you remember about the security."

"Let's see, I was never inside the control room, but Joan was. The outside stuff, I was around it a lot. For one thing, they have these tags on all the pastured horses, sewn into their halters. And they're all numbered. So, say I needed to go out and bring in horse number eight fifty-eight. Well, somebody with that day's access code would have to notify the control room that eight fifty-eight would be leaving its designated area."

Cailen had to admire the simple logic of the arrangement. "These tags used radio frequency identification?"

"I'm not sure, all I know is that they allowed the positions of all the horses on the whole place to be monitored from up at control."

"That's good, Brie, I'm sure it was RFID. Joan, when you were in the control room, could you tell how the monitoring was displayed?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like, was there a big grid representing the maze of pastures, with moving or blinking lights showing each horse's pinpointed position?"

"No, I'm positive there was nothing like that. I remember a screen broken up into pasture segments, each with columns of numbers that had green lights beside them. Wait, it was difficult to take in all that the guy behind the console was telling me, but it seems he said the light stayed green as long as the horse remained in its assigned pasture."

All this was jogging Brie's memory. "Right, and the horse had to make a movement, even a tiny one, once in a while, or else the control room sent somebody out to make sure everything was okay."

"This is very good." Cailen was perking up now that an actual plan was forming. "So, they were only interested in whether each horse was alive and in the pasture where it belonged. Neither of you recalls anything that informed control of the exact spatial position of a given horse, right?"

Neither of them did, and Cailen said she was certain she could remove Penny from the property undetected by the control room. Next, the discussion turned to routes. Penny was embedded fairly centrally in the maze of pastures. They'd have to exit through the back of the property, navigating pasture after pasture before reaching there. Again, Brie's knowledge of the farm was invaluable.

"One break is that all the stallions are either in stalls or turned out in pastures closer to the big barns, so you don't have to worry about dodging them. To get out," Brie glanced from Cailen to Joan and back again, "this will take place in the dark, I suppose?"

"Definitely."

"To get out, it'll be important to remember that each pasture has two gates, located diagonally from each other, one in the northeast corner and one in the southwest corner. You can count on that, in case it's a moonless or cloudy night."

"The fence isn’t wired, is it? I don’t recall having to worry about that when Joan and I took Penny out there."

"For some reason, no."

Cailen nodded. "Not surprising, with the RFID doing all the work. Why run all that hardware when you don't have to? Okay, Brie, once we get her past all those gates and through all those fields, are there any decent spots on the farm's perimeter where we can stash a trailer and load her inconspicuously?"

"Two that I can think of. But let me draw them for you." She scrounged a bright pink flyer, blank on the back, and a child's fat pencil from the top counter drawer. "Okay, say this is the very center pasture." Drawing lots of surrounding rectangles, she asked, "You do realize it's going to be a huge distance with lots of pastures to cross? Now, here's the back row of fields, no horses in these." She shaded in the border of empty fields. "Right about here, relative to that back corner, the one most to the northeast,” she briskly sketched a rough compass in an upper corner of the flyer, “right about here, a large gravel tongue juts back behind the vegetation that shields the fields from the road. It would be easy to pull off onto that with a trailer and just wait."

"What's it ordinarily used for? Surely something." Cailen correctly surmised that everything on the Rainier estate carried the weight of serving a distinct purpose.

"Whenever they're working with heavy equipment on that side of the place, they park it there overnight instead of hauling it all the way back to maintenance. But even if there's something sitting there, we’ll have room to pull in. This time of year, though, I don't think there'll be anything." Brie was drawing again. "Now the other place is all the way over to the west here. Way over here, the farm backs up to a rest area off the interstate. You wouldn't think you could get her onto a trailer there, but you could. A concrete cutoff from the main asphalt goes around behind the building."

"Mmm. That sounds a little too public, doesn't it?"

"Not really. You’re probably as anonymous and unnoticed in an interstate rest stop as on a crowded street in Manhattan. The reason I know about it being a decent place to load is because it’s where hunters who used to trespass on the farm got their kills out. Remember the year somebody shot that yearling, Joan?"

"Must have been before my time there, surely I'd remember a thing like that."

Brie shrugged. "Thought you were already around. Anyway, every year since that happened they've posted a small army in those fields during hunting season. I used to volunteer to do overtime back there. We all just sat around in trucks or whatever, keeping a lookout. But this time of year? It's deserted. You could wait with a trailer in the rest area and pull around back when Penny got there. Only problem is there's a creek you'd have to get the filly across and we don't know whether it's swollen right now." Brie looked around. "So, which spot sounds best?"

Cailen was picturing herself aboard Penny, picking their way along the perimeter fields, searching for landmarks. "At night, which would be easier to locate?"

"The rest area lights show up pretty well, so you couldn't miss it. But that gravel tongue used to have a tall green security light that would make it easy to find in the dark, too, if it's still there. If the light isn't working, you still couldn't go wrong by constantly working your way north and east, and eventually the white gravel would show up."

Cailen surveyed the table. "Take a vote?"

Unanimity met the gravel tongue.

Next came the problem of getting Cailen to Penny. She couldn’t exactly wander out among all those fields and horses at night and expect to find her.

With regard to how they'd position themselves at Rainier Farms in the first place, Joan took over. "My truck is familiar enough to arouse no suspicion under normal circumstances. But given Sassy's visit yesterday, I should have a damn good reason ready for showing up right now. Tell me how this sounds. Without mentioning Cailen specifically, I let show that I am distraught and feeling restless, so I've decided to distract myself by taking a very active interest in Corporate Governance, that big investment colt Sassy bought a few months ago. In fact, I'll drive all the way over there to watch him gallop, saying I might bring him to Churchill in a few days to give him the experience of being here during the Derby hoopla before next year, when he’ll be a three-year-old and I'm very much hoping to run him in it."

When there was no dissent over the plausibility of that approach, Joan went on. "Cailen, I have no illusions that you intend any less than leading Penny out personally, so I won't argue with you over it, as long as I have your word that if there's a surprise, if something goes wrong, responsibility shifts entirely to me. Do I have your word?"

"How do you expect to take the blame for her sneaking a horse worth fifty thousand dollars off the owner's property?"

Cailen could have strangled Hannah for saying that. She had hoped to keep this promise rather hazy in nature.

"Cailen is still on Caulder Stables' books as an employee. She's simply doing what her employer directed, no reason needed. Will you promise to play it that way, Cailen?"

"We won't get caught."

"Correct, but humor me. Think of it as going for the best odds that nothing separates us. Sassy would prosecute you with glee. I don't believe she'd press charges against me."

Their plan was tight, they wouldn't get caught and Joan was right about the rest. "I promise. But we're not getting caught, understood?"

"Understood. I can smuggle you onto the farm in my truck bed's carryall. I'll casually inform Mag that I'm going to drive out for a quick visit with Penny. Nothing remarkable there. In fact, not going to Penny might seem odd. We'll pull up next to the run-in shed. Brie, every field has a run-in, doesn't it?"

"Every one. And that reminds me, between three and four each afternoon and between six and seven each morning, a bunch of feed trucks go out to drop grain at the sheds. So those times have to be avoided for sure."

Joan was nodding. "I'll be careful to go out after five that afternoon. So, once we're next to the shed, Cailen can slip from the truck with a shank and wait for darkness before leading Penny out. Any idea how long it should take, Brie?"

"Leading Penny, cutting through all those gates and on foot, I can't be exact, but better allow for a couple of hours, maybe longer. Really, the place is huge."

Matter-of-factly, Cailen amended, "We can cut that quite a bit, because I'll be riding her."

Brie went directly to the top. "Joan, that filly's been in the field for five months! You know how much on her toes she'll be. It's crazy to try riding her out. You know it's much safer to stay on the ground."

Joan was inclined to agree. Cailen had no idea how high they could get, out free like that. But Joan concentrated on Cailen's perspective, all those mornings she and Penny had puttered around the backside.

"Brie, the ground would be the safer place for you or me, but Cailen knows where she's more at home, and she understands Penny. How about a compromise where she takes a bridle and bit as well as a shank?"

Brie folded her arms across her chest. "I'll be worrying the whole time, but I guess that'll be true anyway. Do you even know how to ride bareback?"

"Sure, it's like riding in a saddle, only no footrests."

Bad move. Brie flared. "Cocky! She's getting cocky, Joan, and with her, that always leads to being careless." She folded her arms again, with more force this time. "Don't let her take the bridle."

Joan slammed the table. "I am not the mother here. Got it? Quit making these appeals to me."

In such a small a room it wasn't easy for that many pairs of eyes to avoid all the others, but they did it. For almost a full minute.

Then Joan took a deep breath and noted with frank delicacy, "Okay, we've each had our turn at snapping someone's head off. Let's hope that's out of our systems now and that we focus on getting that filly off that farm."

It was Brie's contritely murmured, "Yes, mother," that put a true end to the sporadic disharmony.

A heavy thump in the living room brought their attention to the door they were tenuously secured behind.

Brie noticed the stove clock time. "Four already. The kids have been home from school for over an hour and nobody has raided the kitchen? Cinda is working a miracle for us."

"They must be half starved, poor things. I remember how my brother and I would hit the kitchen after school, especially on gray rainy days like this. There isn't a hunger quite like that. Call them in, Brie."

But Brie was inspecting the refrigerator. "Sometimes there isn't a whole lot around, other than jelly bread, which isn't bad to hold them off until supper, but it gets kind of old. Maybe I'll run out to the store real quick and get something good."

Joan didn't want to gape into someone else's refrigerator, but could imagine how the contents of this one must contrast with the tempting vistas of fruit, lunchmeat, leftover cake and pie, cheese and fresh milk she had always found inside theirs at home. She spied a pizza delivery magnet stuck to the refrigerator's freezer door. "Let's call out for pizza, lots of it, and soft drinks."

Brie lit up. "I'll pitch in. They'll blow a gasket when pizza all of a sudden magically appears."

"Is this place good? And do they deliver cookies?" Joan put a fingertip on the magnet.

"Their favorite, that's why it's on the fridge. I think they'll send cookies, we can ask."

Joan already had her cell phone out and was punching buttons. As the number rang, she fished a credit card from her back pocket. She doubled the order Brie relayed and added too many soft drinks. "What kinds of desserts do you have? Then how about a dozen chocolate chip and a dozen macadamia nut?" Brie was bouncing on the balls of her feet, a preview of how the kids were going to jump up and down when they found out.

"How long did they say?"

"Thirty minutes."

Brie opened the door by pulling on the hole where its knob should be. "I should warn Cinda, but don't worry, we'll keep it a surprise for the kids."

Cailen was feeling optimistic about Penny's rescue. One thing she knew for certain was that once she had her hands on Penny, Sassy would have to kill to get her back. While they waited for Brie to return, she accused Joan, "You like kids."

"I do not!"

"I saw your face when you ordered pizza for them. You like kids."

Joan found an indignant excuse. "We are supposed to be in this house demolishing margarita after margarita. The arrival of several pizza boxes brilliantly substantiates that ruse. Hannah, don't you think the pizza lends ingenious authenticity to our story?"

"Sure, but you aren't that great an actress, Joan. Face it, you like kids."

Finally. Something you two agree on. "Gang up on me, I don't care. I feel too good to mind, because I'm starting to believe we can pull off this heist. What's your opinion, Hannah? You’ve been a bit quiet. Does all this sound too farfetched? Maybe we're getting carried away."

"No, what you've worked out so far is totally doable. Of course, there's—"

Brie came back in, breathless. "Sorry, it took a minute to get Cinda off to herself." She turned her chair around and straddled it. "Blaine sends his regards, Cailen. Did I miss anything?"

"Tell him I love him, too. No, we were just using up time 'til you got back."

"Great, I'm back. Let's go over what we have so far. Joan sneaks Cailen into the pasture, Cailen walks," a sideways slide of the eyes at Cailen, "or rides, the filly all the way back to Aiken Road, to the gravel turnaround, where I'll be waiting with a truck and trailer. Now, we shouldn't use the fancy—"

"Hold it. Who said you'd be driving the trailer?" Joan wanted to keep things as uncomplicated as possible. "I'll meet Cailen and Penny."

Hannah came forward, alert. "Brie, you don't need to be running around in the middle of this."

"Who's running around? Somebody has to drive that rig. Joan, you're supposed to be there to have a look at the big shot horse. How would you explain dragging the trailer along, unless you ship him out right away? But then you'd have to take the fancy outfit Sassy gave you and that thing's too conspicuous. We can't put Penny on that without drawing all kinds of attention. And the timing would be totally wrong. You'd have to have What's His Name, Derby Hopeful, on the trailer when you picked her up plus, you'll probably be followed when you leave the farm. Impossible. It can't be you. It has to be me."

Cailen sighed. "She's right."

"Not necessarily. Give me a minute to think this through." Hannah didn't try to hide her aggravation with Cailen. "For one thing, Brie is too well known by people around there. Somebody might recognize her. I'll drive the trailer."

"Recognize her where? Nobody better even see her or the trailer." Cailen had zero intention of entrusting such a critical role to Hannah.

Screeches and screams went up in the living room.

Brie smiled at Joan. "Pizza's here. Okay, so I'm bringing the trailer. Will we borrow Anna's again? And whose truck should I drive?"

Joan had anticipated this part. "I don't believe it's fair to implicate Anna or connect her name to this, however remotely, by using her trailer. She's too invested in the thoroughbred world. But there’s someone else who might be doubly useful, and I think he's far enough removed from racehorses and Churchill to be viewed as an innocent party. Stevie Stroustrup, who was my best friend all through school, has one of those pony party businesses. He pulls a two-horse trailer around with a very nondescript, older model pickup. It's old, but Stevie keeps it in good shape. That thing would blend in anywhere, perfectly unmemorable. And I really think he'll loan it to me, especially on a weekday. The other part is that the pony party industry doesn't bring in a lot of cash. Stevie lives way back in the boonies, where he mainly wants to make enough to support his love of fixing up old cars. He'd probably be very open to boarding Penny on his place, and unless we were caught in the act of taking her in there, I can guarantee she'll be out of the way for as long as we require. Brie, you'd have to call my dad when you get off at their exit and have him show you back to Stevie's place."

Cailen shrugged and nodded at the same time. "Lot of ifs, when can you talk to him?"

"Right now, from here.” Standing tentatively, Joan said, "Why don't you all run the fine brush over our plan one more time while I see if I can get Stevie?" When there were no objections, she ducked out the back door, drawing her cell phone.

The call went better than Joan could have asked. Returning to the kitchen, she said, "Well, ladies, that went well. Stevie even has a set of dummy plates for the trailer so the bad guys wouldn’t be able to trace us if somebody notices it.” Joan rubbed her hands together and said, “Looks like we're going to abduct a filly. Tomorrow night."

All reigning order blew straight to hell. Cailen cocked her head to its stubborn slant and launched into a list of all the reasons why they needed more time. Hannah actually got to her feet, threatening to leave. Brie, who'd been filling in landmarks on her drawing, bounced the chubby pencil’s eraser onto the table to the accompaniment of a blur of Spanish curses and stood too, ready to follow Hannah.

Three stressed out women, all low on sleep and food, one suffering from an estrogen imbalance, and Joan Caulder was able to bring them around to her ambitious agenda in eight minutes. She actually timed it.

The salient features of Joan's logic were that such a rapid response would be unanticipated by Sassy, Lara, and their people. Not that they should count on taking them off guard, but it couldn't hurt to try and wrong-foot them. Also, who wanted to spend one more day in this paranoid limbo than was absolutely necessary? Nobody. Then there was the compelling reality of springtime and the pony party business. Tomorrow and the next day, Thursday and Friday, Stevie and his trailer were free, but for Saturday and Sunday they were solidly engaged.

The stiffest objection came from Cailen. "That gives me no time to get you a new cell phone. Sassy knows the number you have now. With RFID on the horses and all the other technology they have in place, I'd bet her security guys are able to intercept phone conversations to and from a known number, as long as the phone is on the farm or in the immediate area. And we need to be able to communicate. So, I thought I'd pick up a new phone for you."

Joan had to think about that one for a bit. "The phone needs to be in the immediate area to be intercepted and they'd have to know the number?"

"Yeah, but we should define that to be a large area."

"So, if Car and I switch phones, she doesn't have his number, that should work, right?"

Brie winked. "You married a clever woman, Cailita."

"Too clever." Cailen reluctantly allowed, "Yeah, that would work and it would keep me from raising any red flags by shopping for a new phone. Does Sassy have your number, Brie?"

"Take a guess."

"Okay, that's a no. Anyway, there’s no reason for her to even look it up, since you aren’t involved as far as she knows. Then moving on this tomorrow shouldn't be as tough as it sounded at first."

"Lovely. Now, Stevie is going to leave his little rig parked at that last rest stop before you get to my parents' exit on sixty-four. Brie, if you can scrunch down on the floor of my truck to that far, I'll pull the same trick as with Cailen at the run-in shed. I'll stop the truck close to the restroom so you can pop out and duck inside. Whoever follows me shouldn't even be off the ramp before we get you into the building. I'll go in, pretend to use the bathroom, and resume my innocent trip to Camden. You can wait five or ten minutes before following in Stevie’s rig."

Brie had taken her seat again, but Hannah continued to pace and suggested, "In case there's a problem with the gravel pickup place, I don't think it would hurt to check out that creek behind the rest area, the one Cailen would have to get Penny across if you had to load her there. Brie, would it be convenient for one of you to stop there and check the creek on your way to the farm?"

"Great idea, yeah, we pass it on the way. I can stop and run back there to have a look. Nobody will be following me. Won't hurt to have a backup plan."

Joan beamed. "Wonderful. Are we all set, then?"

"Except for how to get me into the carryall and Brie on the floor of your truck without being seen."

"Damn, this is like functioning in quicksand."

Hannah, reluctantly resolved to Brie being in the middle of this, offered, "Why not have my brother take your truck out to fill the gas tank right before training in the morning? You'll be leaving from the barn and in a rush, right?"

"As soon as we can get away, yes."

"Okay, Car takes your truck, and whoever is watching you stays at the barn." Hannah looked at Cailen. "I hate to suggest this, but if you stay here overnight again, Car could come by and pick you up in the morning after topping Joan's tank. And for bonus, we wouldn't have to take the chance of smuggling you back through Paul's house tonight to get you into ours."

Joan cringed for Cailen, but Hannah's proposal did make sense.

Cailen flashed on Blaine's round blue eyes peering at her over the fist raised to his mouth for thumb sucking access. "You're right. You're right. That's the smartest course. I'll spend the night here again, if Cinda's agreeable." Cailen civilly addressed this to Hannah before adding to Joan and Brie. "We owe Cinda big time for all this."

"As for getting Brie into the truck," Hannah encircled Brie in her arms, "we're going to sneak off to the room first thing when we get there in the morning and Joan, if you pick up a load of bran on your way home tonight, which we are actually running short of, then in the morning drive your truck into the shedrow for unloading next door in the feed room, Brie can slide into the truck from the room and nobody watching from outside could possibly see. In case Jimmy's paying attention, I won't emerge for several minutes, and then I'll make sure he hears me mention that Brie's taking a nap. In fact, since Brie won't be showing up for work, Car and I can make sure Jimmy hears that she isn't feeling well. I'll make fake visits to the room with tea and stuff all morning."

"Brilliant, Hannah. We're low on bran?" Joan usually knew the supplies inventory pretty well.

"Uh-huh."

"I'll also give Mag a call tonight, explaining that I need to get away from Louisville and will be driving over to watch Gov gallop."

So the felony, as Joan had to repeatedly ask Brie to quit calling it, was arranged down to the fine print by seven o’clock that evening, when Brie and Hannah considerately gave Joan and Cailen a few minutes alone in the kitchen.

At first, they could only look at each other in astonishment at what they were about to do.

Joan said, "Last chance. Is there any way we can get around this?"

"Can't think of any." Cailen hugged her close. "Thanks."

"Don't thank me, I love her as much as you do. Think maybe you can get some sleep tonight, angel? We've mapped out a big day for ourselves tomorrow." Joan rearranged the hug to make kissing easier.

"I'll try. If you throw some blankets in the carryall, I can probably sleep on the way to South Carolina. Um…you know how I gave you my word about letting you take the blame?"

"Not negotiable, Cailen, I mean it." Joan's tone went arctic.

"I'm not reneging, but now I want your word on something. If there's a problem—a million unexpected things could come up out there—and you don't hear from me by the time you think you should have tomorrow, I need your word that you and Brie will sit tight until daybreak. If Penny and I get stranded out there in the daylight and turn up in a strange pasture when they come around to feed, we're sunk anyway, so by that time it won't matter if you and Brie act independently. But until morning, I want to be able to count on you guys going strictly to plan. And let me initiate any phone calls, don't call me, okay?"

"Why?"

"Because of the off chance somebody comes out to check on one of the horses and Penny and I have to lay low. All we'd need is for the phone to sound off or even vibrate and scare her or me and give us away. So, let's just agree that any communication will be initiated by me."

"Got it."

"You'll both stay put until morning? I can count on that much time to work with, no matter what happens, definitely?

"Word of honor. I'll tell Brie."

Cailen held on tight again. "We should get out there. I miss you so much."

"Me too. We'll be sleeping together in our own bed Friday night and Penny will be safe and sound."

"One more kiss. I love you."

When the kiss ended, Joan smacked Cailen's butt and whispered, "Try to refrain from staring at little Blake tonight."

"Blaine."


© 2006 Margo Moon

Monday, November 9, 2009

What's Wrong With Us?

Seeing as there are only three chapters left in Grand Theft Equine, Starr Ann and I have been revving up to start posting on a regular basis again. So, we were doing some cowgirl image searches, right?

We were both shocked that neither of us remembers this picture of Jane Fonda from Cat Ballou.


We don't remember this one, either.


I swear, we feel like we should turn in a license or something.

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Grand Theft Equine - Chapter Twenty-Four: Inquiry

Previous chapters are available on the sidebar.



ON THE FIRST sunny afternoon past last chance of frost, Cailen set a quick pace as soon as training was over. She spurred Joan through a bolted lunch at the kitchen counter before changing from barn clothes to old shirts and shorts fit for working in the garden.

"Angel, you've been itching to get your hands on these perennials since November, haven't you?" Joan didn’t hate gardening. She appreciated the smell of thawing dirt as much as the next person, though she preferred hers tinged with at least a hint of seasoned horse manure.

Cailen's was an acute case of spring fever. After vigorously probing some loose, graying mulch with a short piece of woody stem, she did not look pleased. "Yeah, well it's a shame to let all this work go to waste. Justine put these in, right? She sure did know what she was doing. There's a real plan in the works here, Joan. How many years have the delphiniums and columbines bloomed since she added new cuttings, do you remember?"

"The what?" All Joan saw was a confusion of nondescript weedy overgrowth.

Cailen dumbed it down. "Did Justine mention when she'd have to replace any of these, like the ones that bloom in vertical, cone-shaped clusters?"

"Not to me. She did seem to have intricate plans, with diagrams and a calendar, but I never really helped out here, so I have no idea what they were. It was beautiful out here when everything was in bloom, though."

Cailen surveyed the neglected patch, thinking she would need a little luck to reverse the devastation. "Did she leave those plans here at the house, by any chance?"

"Now that I can answer. She took them with her."

"Figures." By authority of a decision made, Cailen straightened from her squat. "Here's what we're going to do. We have to weed all this very carefully. You can tell the weeds from the offshoots and shrubs we want to keep, right?"

Joan reached for something she considered ugly. "This would be a wee—"

"No, not those." Cailen stopped Joan's hand just before it uprooted an iris rhizome by what remained of its brown dried-up stalk and suggested, "Why don't you point out some of the ones you'd keep?"

Joan pointed at some brown Sudan grass, a laid-over swatch with dried up Johnson grass in it, and some bright green early orchard grass that Cailen guessed had probably hitched a ride to the yard on boots from hay at the track.

Touching Joan's shoulder, Cailen gave in to amusement. "You're only seeing what could be used for pasture. Unfortunately, all of that constitutes weeds for our purposes." She tried to sound encouraging and enthusiastic. "I know, why don't you be the assistant at first? I'll work on the weeding while you run out for some new mulch. Most of this old stuff is moldy and has to go."

Joan narrowed her eyes. "You're matronizing me."

"Try to think of it as rescuing Justine's perennials from harm's way."

"Fine, I don't mind running the errands. What kind of mulch and how mulch?"

"You mean how much."

"No, how mulch mulch and what kind? Also, who's on first?" Joan thought that was pretty funny, but Cailen had both hands buried in soil now and seemed transported by sensation. Joan really didn't have the heart to break the spell with more corny humor. "So how many bags of mulch do you think we'll need, angel?"

Cailen fluffed around, gently feeling for bulbs, then stood to estimate volumes. "Get twenty bags of the red cedar to be on the safe side. Is there a decent amount of storage room in the shed in case we have a few bags left over?"

Joan eyed the shed door. There was every possibility she'd never been in there. Who the hell knew what was in that shed? "I'll go check." Her report was that, yes, there was plenty of room inside. The thing was practically empty.

"Great. Twenty bags, then. And do I get a surprise?"

"Trying to keep me gone longer so you can weed it all by yourself?"

"Harm's way, Joan, harm's way." Cailen kissed her good-bye. "Hmm, that warm sun on your skin, you smell even better than the dirt. Be careful."

"I will." Joan drove away smiling at herself for being so schoolgirl gratified over smelling even better than the dirt.

Half a muck-basketful of weeds after Joan left, an unfamiliar car cruised through the alley. It passed on by, but came back the opposite way, even more slowly, seconds later. Without appearing to do so, Cailen made certain she wasn't hanging out of her shirt or anything. Probably some jerk seeing what he can see. She would have to discuss privacy fencing with Joan. Too bad, in a neighborhood like this, leaving the alley open could be so nice and neighborly, but it all hinged on whether a couple of idiots chose to mess it up for everybody else. Cailen inwardly lost all patience when the car stopped and somebody got out.

Her demeanor must have reflected her agitation, because the woman, at least it was a woman, started right in with apologies. "I'm so sorry to disturb you. Nothing worse than finally getting the perfect day to dive into all this," she swept the sunglasses from her face and gestured broadly at the sky with them, "then having someone crash the intimacy of the whole thing."

Joan was always so courteous with people, and Cailen didn't want to become known as the grouchy one, so she made herself smile as she dropped everything she'd been doing. "That's all right. It really is a pretty day, isn't it?"

"Certainly is." The woman couldn't get enough of looking at the garden.

"Is there something I can help you with?"

"No, thanks. You're probably going to think this is creepy, but I used to live here and have been thinking about this garden since waking up to such gorgeous weather. I took the day off and have spent much of the morning trying to resist driving by here like a stalker. No pun."

Cailen's real smile replaced the polite one. "Please tell me you're Justine."

Behind those deep brown eyes, a few deductions were made before Justine offered a friendly hand. "And I'll bet you're more than the gardener."

Letting that pass, since she was in the dark about the circumstances of the breakup, Cailen shook hands. "I've been trying to decipher what your intentions were here. All the labor you poured into this really shows. I'd want to see it cared for too, if I were you."

Justine continued to regard Cailen without replying. She shaded her eyes to look up toward the quiet house. All the solitary hours came back, seeing Cailen out here passing the time, working alone. "Is she having her pre-feed time nap?"

"Joan? No, she ran out for mulch."

"Mulch. Joan. Joan Caulder? Dazzling woman, about yay tall?" Justine gauged Joan's height fairly accurately.

Cailen couldn't purge the unalloyed affection from her grin. "She's due back any minute. Do you have time to stay a while and keep me on the right track here? Joan said there were written plans. I'd really like to follow through on the garden the way you designed it. I'll bet you can tell me everything that needs new cuttings and what's situated where, even without your notes."

*****

Joan swung her truck into the alley. Shit! The car was new, but the backyard wasn't so big that Joan couldn't recognize who Cailen was engrossed in deep consultation with, both of them gesturing significantly at some apparently fascinating area of ground near their feet. She unloaded one of the oversize bags and clutched it to her before embarking along the only approach, by way of a narrow concrete walk, to where they stood. Nothing awkward here, when you get down to it. Justine is the one who left me. So why do I feel like a criminal for helping Cailen with the gardening? Maybe because Justine asked me about a thousand times, an absolutely reasonable request, too, to share some time out here with her? Thank God it isn't Kate, at least. Kate could give even Lara a verbal run for her money. Please, Jus, don't be in the sardonic mood. Let it be a grown up banker lady day.

Justine had to half-turn from Cailen to greet her. "Joan, hi."

"Hi, Jus. Wait, let me put this down." Afraid of slaying one of the desirable plants—she really needed to discuss that whole weed versus worthwhile plant trick with Cailen later—Joan circled round, not sure where to disburden herself of the mulch. "Uh, let's see."

"On the sidewalk would be safe," Cailen suggested.

"Right." Her armor thus laid aside, Joan felt exposed but hugged Justine anyway, and with genuine fondness. "You look great."

"You too." Justine surveyed Joan from head to toe. "Enough of the mushy stuff. You almost killed my garden from neglect, do you realize that?" Her hands went to her hips, but the good spark was in her eyes.

For reply, Joan searched the ground and pointed to her cluster of orchard grass. "Weed or darling plant?"

"Weed." Justine didn't even pause to think.

"Weed or esteemed garden member?" Joan indicated the shoot Cailen had barely kept her from pulling.

"Iris."

"You and Cailen win. My answers were the exact opposite. You should be happy for my so-called neglect. If I'd flailed around out here alone, there'd be nothing left to save."

They stood around, eating fudgesickles and discussing the garden, until Cailen peeled the paper from her second bar and the other two said thanks, but one was enough for them.

So Cailen rolled up the brown sack's top until it snugged against the cool cardboard of the ice cream box. "If you're sure, I should get these inside before they melt."

When the screen door smacked shut Justine said, "How did Cailen get those incredible leg muscles?"

"Riding horses."

"Does she work for you?"

"With me, yes."

Cailen’s departure pushed gardening to the background, so there were no diversions from the inevitable catching up. "How's Brie?"

"Jade died."

Justine closed her eyes. "That's too sad to imagine. When? Is Brie okay?"

Still unable to fully take in stride the realness of Jade being gone, Joan halfway shook her head, then shrugged. "It's been a little over five months now. Brie handles it. I'm sure she'd love to see you, if you ever get the chance to drop by the barn."

"Maybe I will, if you truly don't mind. I miss Brie."

Joan nodded. "Brie misses you, too. Still." Jus was not going to believe this. A huge smile overtook Joan's face. "Brie's living off the track."

"No! With someone?"

"Believe it or not, I dare to venture that Senorita Contenta has been snared, heart and soul. She's a total goner." Joan followed Justine over to the yard's one tree, a billowy black sycamore whose leaves were barely poking out, to sit on the scrofulous green wooden bench beneath it. Justine had bought the seat during their first summer together and had stored it in the shed during winter weather. Joan hadn't thought to take it inside for protection, though. As they dusted away flaky paint before sitting, Joan commented, "I'll sand this down and paint it soon."

Rocking back, hands clasped in front of her crossed knees, Justine soaked up the sight of the familiar yard. Joan's words got through and she looked down at the weathered bench slats. "Joan, honey, you will not. Unless we disguise it as a horse, you're not about to spend five minutes on it. Cailen might. But you won't."

Joan heard more nostalgia than reproval in the remark and she had to laugh. "Maybe I'll help Cailen do it."

"You two are pretty inseparable, eh?" Justine looked sideways at her. "Give it up, will you? I'm not on the verge of freaking out."

"I know you aren't. But, Jus, about everything. I've realized lately that I should have made some effort to extend myself more."

Jus patted Joan's leg. "Honey, 'effort' is the operative word there. I will wager it's no effort to be out here with Cailen, and that's wonderful, I'm happy for you both." She used a single finger to loop Joan's forelock into a curl. "Please stop looking so guilty. My personal life has gotten extremely interesting, too. So, relax."

"Interesting? How? What's her name?" Joan gave Justine's arm a tweak.

"Tracy. Adorable, soft-hearted, butch and a little too young for me, but I can't help that."

"Congratulations. Hannah is four years younger than Brie."

"Her name's Hannah? Pretty."

The screen door announced Cailen's return from the house, where she'd found as many little tasks—bathroom, writing down her email address and phone number, and starting a load of barn clothes in the washer—as she could think of to give Joan and Justine a long enough visit without making Joan feel deserted, just in case things got uncomfortable out there.

She held out a piece of paper as she drew close to the bench. "Before we forget, here's my email address and cell phone number."

They'd evidently already discussed trading this information, Joan surmised, since Justine took it as a matter of course and retrieved a card from her back pocket.

"Here's all my current contact information." Justine stood. "Cailen, wonderful to meet you, see you Saturday. Joan, really, I can't say how nice this has been."

"Me too. Please come by the track and see Brie."

"Any chance I'd get to meet Hannah, too?"

"She grooms the four horses next to Brie's, so I can guarantee you'll meet her."

"Brie in love. Amazing. How about Sunday after next?"

"Actually, that would be fine, you could still visit with Brie and Hannah, but Cailen and I are taking that Sunday off."

All Justine could do was turn reverentially to Cailen. "Either you're superwoman or you're sneaking something into her coffee. Good job, whichever it is." She hugged Joan goodbye and promised to see Cailen at noon on Saturday before insisting they get back to work on the weeds instead of walking her to her car.

As Justine drove off, Joan asked about Saturday at noon.

"Justine's bringing her notes and diagrams and we're going to garden together. If it's okay with you, of course. I'll cancel if you're at all uncomfortable."

"Not a bit. I was at first, but that went great." Joan put an arm across Cailen's shoulder. "Allow me to warn you, though. If Kate ever shows up, don't expect the same luck. In that event, we run to the house and lock the doors."

*****

The very next afternoon, Cailen heard the yard calling again, since the weather was cloned from the day before. And muscling aside the grunt work before Saturday and Justine was only polite. Joan was showing some promise at weeding, but Cailen let her off the hook after a while by suggesting they could do with a couple of tarps and one more rake, a heavy claw one. And a hoe, for some reason there was no hoe in the shed. And the clippers needed to be sharpened. Plus, they'd gone through all but two of those bags of mulch, so five more would be good. Poor Joan. By the time Cailen finished her list, running errands loomed almost as oppressively as weeding.

Cailen was ready to take pity and absolve for both jobs. "Why don't you let me go for that stuff after I finish here. I don't mind a bit."

Snagging the list and shoving it into her pocket, Joan brightened. "You don't have to humor me. Besides, I think I'm starting to catch on to weeding already. You're probably going to end up being very impressed with what a good gardener I become."

"Already am. Look at the headway you've made on your side of the walk today."

Joan turned a complete circle. "Am I okay to go out? No dirt or grass stains on my butt or anything?"

The trowel slipped from Cailen's hand and landed with its tip poking into the friable ground. "Maybe we should forget this today and go upstairs. No big hurry, when you get down to it."

"Rain moving in tomorrow, remember?"

Cailen looked from her dirt-crusted hand to the front of Joan's work jeans. Soil washes out. As she took the first step forward, Cailen's intention penetrated and Joan made a mad dash for her truck, barely getting locked in before Cailen crashed into the driver's door and deliberately left dirty finger streaks down the window.

She called from outside the closed cab, "Will you stay inside with me while it rains tomorrow?"

"It's a date. I love you." Joan's voice came out muffled and small, swallowed by the interior's acoustic insulation.

"Me too. Be careful."

Just as Cailen was getting engrossed in the moiling again, another unfamiliar car, not Justine's, came sliding down the alley, extra slowly. Cailen thought, Surely this isn't Kate. When the car slipped with greased ease into Joan's vacated spot, Cailen stood in time to see a chauffeur hustle obligingly from a navy blue Rolls Royce with the blackest tinted windows she had ever seen. The impeccably uniformed man, a human version of the car in his sleek navy blue costume and dark, dark glasses, handed Sassy Rainier smartly out the rear door. Rolls Royce man then settled himself to stand stoically by as Sassy stalked up the walk.

She neither flitted nor fluttered this time, but walked with unyielding purpose. She wore a suit the color of brushed steel that appeared equally as resistant to wrinkling, its fit tailored and tubular, the severe austerity of which matched Sassy's hard-featured and businesslike face. This flinty woman bore no trace of the defeated, submissive one who'd tenderly left champagne and two glasses on the nightstand in that cabin in Camden. Two paces before reaching Cailen she whipped a fast check of her watch. One pace away, she held up a hand in imperial indication that no greeting was necessary.

Good, none was planned.

"Ms. Eagleton, I do not have much time, so listen carefully please. You are to move from this house at once. Not tomorrow. Tonight."

Cailen allowed herself an incredulous snicker before turning her back in dismissal of such nonsense.

Controlled fury put iron reinforcement into Sassy's voice as she raised it to announce, "Pennington's Lass weighs one thousand two hundred and thirty-five pounds. At present stock yard prices, she will bring eight hundred and sixty-two dollars."

Wheeling, Cailen gritted out, "What are you talking about?"

Sassy smiled, enjoying the sting of infliction. "Pennington's Lass, don't you remember?"

"Of course I remember. Why are you telling me what she weighs?" The sunlight, so buttery warm just moments before, had taken on a grating whiteness, its glare pushing Cailen to pat her pockets for sunglasses she'd left on the kitchen counter.

From behind the cool wraparound barricade of designer shades, Sassy's eyes shone in anticipated triumph as she delivered her well-coached lines. "Such a good girl, the men said. A very cooperative animal. The men from the abattoir said she stepped onto the scales and stood for them like an angel. Wasn't that a sweet thing for them to call her, an angel?"

Rage and scalding fear sent rigidity, followed closely by trembling weakness, through Cailen's limbs. Caution told her to keep check on the surface of her reactions, though, since that initial show of anger a moment ago appeared to be exactly what Sassy was after. Cailen waited.

"In Europe, you know, horse is often served as the main course. Very tasty, too. I enjoy it." Sassy's lasered and enameled teeth, superhumanly white, shone in a sick smile. "They say the flavor of a contented animal, an angel like Penny for instance, is quite superior to that of a stressed or nervous one. You and Joan can be thanked for any added flavor, given the lengths to which you've both gone on behalf of keeping her happy. Of course, this is only in the event you foolishly disobey my order to vacate."

Mid-ambush and maintaining provisionary neutrality across her features, Cailen assessed the situation as critically as she was able. Sassy was threatening to send Penny to the killers unless Cailen moved from Joan's house, no doubt unless she left Joan completely. Remembering what Joan had said about fifty thousand dollars being nothing to Sassy, Cailen had no reason to think she was bluffing on that count. Joan had also been very clear about Sassy having no interest in horses aside from business. Try as she might, Cailen could come up with no basis for either argument or appeal for Penny. Anything said without being thoroughly thought out could even make this worse.

An electronic device beeped from inside Sassy's slate-flat purse. She swiveled her head toward the chauffeur, who raised one hand with three fingers extended.

Sassy spoke quickly. "Joan's on her way back. I'm sure you've taken my point concerning the horse. I want you out of this house and Joan's life by midnight tonight. Joan is never to know of this conversation. If she gets wind of it, or if you do not leave, the papers have already been signed and a single call from me will have the meat packers loading Pennington's Lass onto one of their vans within an hour." Sassy let that sink in. "And if you think Joan can fix everything if you tell and she speaks with me, you'd both be mistaken. Oh, and don't worry about notifying me that you've cleared out of here. We will be watching and listening. Goodbye, Ms. Eagleton. I'll give your love to Penny when I get home."

All but caved in by Sassy's tactics, Cailen asked, "What do you think you can possibly gain by this?"

Sassy started to leave, but reconsidered. Some of that tender brokenness she'd shown in the cabin tried to emerge, but got chased back in. "Ms. Eagleton, you are a symptom of my Joan's inability to see her true place in this world. This is to save Joan. She deserves nothing less than first class, and since she can't quite see that, I have to see it for her." Any reply Cailen might have found held no interest for Sassy, so she pivoted on her first-class stilettos and jabbed them at the sidewalk all the way to her car.

Cailen stood motionless until forgetting to breathe made her so dizzy she lost balance and stumbled. That jolt and the realization that Penny's life depended on how well she handled the next few hours restored her clarity of mind.

Treat this like a programming problem. Stay in the left brain. I can do this. It's a problem like any other and there is a solution.

Fighting tears, Cailen ran down the knowns. Recalling the elaborate security system at Rainier Farms and Sassy's bottomless resources, she assumed that the phone was probably tapped and the house could even be bugged. So anything said on the phone or inside must be well staged. That meant intercepting Joan outside, in the yard, when she got home. And someone was probably watching the yard, from a parked car or even from a nearby upstairs window, since lots of the houses in this neighborhood had been divided up into apartments, which changed occupants often. So somehow, Cailen had to prevent a visible reaction from Joan as she learned of their bizarre predicament. Telling her inside the shed was one possibility, but both of them suddenly ducking in there might look suspicious. She'd have to wing that part. First things first, though. Cailen stormed into the house and dialed Brie's number, while keeping watch on the alley from a kitchen window for Joan's truck.

The cell rang three times before Brie answered. "Brie? Cailen. Listen, I know this is sudden and upsetting and unbelievable, but could I use the room tonight?"

"What, you and Joan looking to spice things up with different settings already?"

"Brie, please, I'm in no shape right now to play around, really. Listen to me. I am not joking. We're breaking up. I need a place to stay, just for tonight, then tomorrow I'll make other arrangements." Cailen could picture Brie's knitted, narrowing expression too well as this processed.

"Cailita, I don't know what to say. Please don't go to the room, come here tonight. What about Joan? Should I come be with one of you? Baby, why don't you come here with me, and maybe Hannah should go to Joan. Is Joan at home?"

"She will be soon. Look, I'll come there, but how about holding off on sending Hannah until she clears it with Joan? I don't know what she'll want. Brie, I'm so sorry to dump this on you. I have to go now, be there in two or three hours."

"We feed today, baby, so make it after four forty-five, can you?"

"Be there around five then, if you're sure its okay."

"Sure, anything you need. And I'll keep this phone very close until you get here. If either you or Joan calls, I'll answer immediately." Brie was quiet for a moment. "All I can say is I love both of you."

"I know. Thanks. Sorry."

The situation demanded thinking like Sassy's people. Ideally, they'd heard that conversation. Now, Cailen had to appear to find a way to pick a fight with Joan when she returned. And that had to be initiated outside, where it wouldn't be overheard. Cailen knew that open-air surveillance was technologically possible, but using it required too little background noise and too clear a shot at the target to be feasible among the boxy, closely spaced houses on their block. Sassy's people would have had to park a van full of equipment practically inside the backyard to monitor conversations out there.

As she turned to the problem of keeping a lid on Joan’s reactions, the truck swept into its spot and Cailen shot out the door. On her way down the walk, the idea hit that if Joan’s arms were wrapped around one of those large bags of mulch, the broader physical manifestations of her responses would be stifled. And since they'd be unloading stuff, it would be natural to enter the shed together. Then Cailen ruled out the idea of talking inside the shed. Being an enclosure made it a place where a listening device would work.

"Hi, angel, pretty quick trip, huh? And I proudly claim success with every item on your list." Joan toned down her volume. "I hurried so we could maybe finish weeding early enough to run upstairs before supper."

"Great. Here, let's start with the heavy stuff first, grab a bag of mulch."

Joan crisply saluted Cailen's take-charge manner, saying, “Yes, ma'am, whatever you say, ma'am," and hefted one of the bulky plastic bags.

Cailen grabbed the new rake and sharpened clippers before starting up the walk abreast of her.

Huffing under the burden of the mulch, Joan gave the rake and clippers a pointed look and smirky smile. "Don't strain yourself there."

Several paces inside the yard, Cailen deemed it safe to speak freely. "Joan, do not visibly react when I say this. Please. Keep looking ahead." She hurried her speech and slowed their pace. "Sassy Rainier was here while you were gone. No, don't talk, just listen, this is very bad. She says she'll sell Penny to the killers if I don't clear myself from your life. Keep walking and don't react. She claims to have us under surveillance. I know I sound crazy, but I swear this is all true. Now let's just go into the shed and unload, but it could be bugged so I can't tell you anymore until we're back out again. Understand, so far?"

Joan nodded. "Yes."

They took the final few steps to the shed and entered. Cailen feigned a casual air. "How much did they charge you to sharpen these trimmers?"

"Five dollars, I think." Joan's mind was fragmented, but she had the gist of how they should play this.

Outside, Cailen put her hands on her hips, tried to keep them from trembling, and drifted over by the area Joan had been weeding earlier.

Joan joined her. "I need more details."

"I know. Just keep looking down at the dirt with me while I talk. She came in a chauffeured car, marched up here and told me to leave you by midnight tonight. If I don't or if I tell you what she's threatening, Penny will be loaded onto a killer's van within the hour." Cailen stooped to pick up a handful of dirt and sift it through her fingers. "I totally believe her, Joan."

"Then so do I. Tell me what to do next." Joan put her hands on her hips, in imitation of Cailen's attitude, and appeared to survey the ground at her feet.

Cailen stood. "Let's finish unloading and I'll fill you in on what I've come up with. Remember, only casual talk in and around the shed." This time they each took a bag of mulch. "I already called Brie from inside the house to ask for a place to stay tonight. You and I have to stage an argument that gets bad enough for me to leave. It has to come entirely from my side and you just have to seem bewildered."

"That should be easy enough, I am bewildered. Are you okay?"

"Considering Penny's life is at the mercy of someone who is obviously psychotic, I am. The best thing for Penny is for us to stay sharp, so that's what we're going to do."

"Yes we will. Is there any chance that my talking to Sassy could stop this?"

They were nearing the shed. "No. She covered that. When we go in this time, I'm going to start picking on you."

"I love you and I know you love me." Joan got that in before they were too close to the shed.

Cailen dumped her load on top of the lumpy stack of bags. "So I don't get it. Why you cannot, after this amount of time at it, tell a weed from an expensive, established perennial, is beyond me."

"Angel, I'm sorry. I really am trying." They walked back outside.

"Back to your question, your calling Sassy would be disastrous for Penny. Now, when I get to Brie's I'll tell her the truth about what's going on. Brie already offered for Hannah to come here to be with you for as long as you need her tonight. That'll work well for us. After we stage our fight in the house I'll leave. When I get to their house, I'll think of some way for us to get together tomorrow to chart a plan. By then we'll have had some time to think. I shouldn't show up to work tomorrow. Anyway, you accept Hannah's offer to come over and I'll send a note with her outlining some safe way for us to meet. In the meantime, if you think of anything for her to relay back to me, write it down, don't try to say it out loud."

Approaching the shed with the final load, the real conversation gave way again to the contrived one.

"What has gotten into you, Cailen? Before I left we were talking and laughing, joking around. I'm sorry if I ruined a couple of the good ones, but please, don't be angry. I didn't grow up working in greenhouses like you did, you know."

"Growing up doing it or not, it isn't genetic sequencing, it's pulling weeds for God's sake! How simple can I make it?"

Outside, heading for the back door, Cailen asked, "So are we clear on this? Big blowup in the house. You act hurt and stunned. Hannah will bring written instructions from me about where we can meet. I love you with all my heart, I can't say that enough."

"Mine too." Still a safe distance from the bottom of the steps, Joan averred, "We will protect Penny, angel. Remember she is the only remaining leverage, and Sassy won't lightly give up the advantage of her continued existence."

"I promised Penny we'd always take care of her."

"And we will." Joan went up the back steps ahead of Cailen.

The fight was a remarkable display, or would have been to anyone with access to audio and video. Warm kisses and protective embraces punctuated harsh words, insults and pleas for compassion. When Cailen began to pack, Joan lent loving, silent assistance to provisioning a bag for an absence of two days. Neither of them could fathom enduring the present terms for longer than that.


© 2006 Margo Moon

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Dona Nobis Pacem


My best friend Starr Ann and I spent much of yesterday brainstorming over what to say about Peace for this year's BlogBlast.

In the morning, while we were cleaning stalls, Starr Ann had herself an idea that featured me writing a poem about Peace. Well, after hearing me try out a few lines, Starr Ann realized she'd overshot. Can I help it that Peace so temptingly rhymes with grease, police, and almost with squeeze? Anyway, no poem.

Then, during lunch I started thinking maybe it would be fun for Starr Ann and me to collaborate on a parody of some famous song, only our words would be all about Peace. Starr Ann got all excited and said, "Let's do it to Crystal Blue Persuasion!" Which sounded good to me, but we had to start with the actual lyrics and we soon realized that Crystal Blue Persuasion already is about Peace.

We finally decided we were pushing ourselves too hard and the best thing to do would be just to sleep on it and fully expect a fantastic idea to be there, intact, when we woke up today. So, when I woke up with nada, I rushed to Starr Ann's room, positive the Peace Fairy (heh) had visited her overnight. Odd as this might sound, Starr Ann didn't wake up with the post fully formed in her mind either.

By that time, we were getting a little bit ticked at Mimi Lenox for moving BlogBlast up a day this year. If only we had that extra 24 hours, Starr Ann and I were sure we could come up with something. We were down at the pond, tossing stones in the water, finishing up our morning coffee, and blaming Mimi when all of a sudden, Starr Ann threw a rock in and at the instant it broke the surface, Starr Ann called out, "Peace!" Then, as the circle began to expand on the water where the stone had fallen, Starr Ann followed up with, "...starts with a simple act that spreads throughout the universe."

I pitched a stone and when it hit I said, "Peace!" And as the ring formed, I said, "...is knowing you've tried your best."

Starr Ann and I ended up hurling pebbles for a long time, broadcasting the word Peace! and a bunch of things it can mean, just the first things that came to our minds. Like,

Peace! ...lives in the smallest kindness

Peace! ...is a full, deep breath

Peace! ...spelled backward cannot be pronounced

Peace! ...is that blue heron standing there across the pond

Peace! ...in shorthand is ☮!

Peace! ...is bound to catch on sooner or later

Peace! ...is knowing your critters are healthy and happy

Peace! ...was invented by hippies in 1962

Peace! ...trumps religion

Peace! ...needs to walk up and smack Violence! upside the head

Peace! ...is the ultimate public option

When we'd run out of rocks to throw, Starr Ann shrugged her shoulders and said, "Let's just write those on the Chronicles tomorrow, because you know, Peace! ...is not fretting over your BlogBlast post."

And of course, that's what I did.

On the hike back up to the house, Starr Ann laughed that one laugh and said, "I could have sworn Crystal Blue Persuasion was about talking this woman named Crystal Blue into bed."

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Chapter Twenty-Three: Eased

Previous chapters are available on the sidebar.



Trailing with Car behind the last set, in which Captain Natural had breezed a sharp four furlongs in forty-seven flat, Joan spied approximately one-third of the front right quarter panel on Cailen’s truck parked there in its old spot. She cleared the end of Mitch’s barn next door at a full run and a scan of the shedrow put Brie’s smile directly in her sights. Still running full out, Joan yelled, “Where, Brie?”

Brie tipped a rolled bandage pad toward the office door and Joan aimed her path more precisely for it. She crossed the boundary from glaring sunshine to shedrow shade and entered the office in a move whose grace could only have been surpassed had she not slammed the door too hard, which sent Singer into a little dance as he cleared the corner.

Outside, Brie smacked the rolled up pad against her knee. “I knew she was going to scare the horses.”

The dust from Singer’s kicked up heels still floated on the air as inside, a long embrace was reluctantly slackened so Joan could smooth at the curls framing Cailen's face.

"How long do we have, angel?"

Cailen's mouth was so dry she could barely speak. "We're both pretty healthy, I'd say we have a good fifty years."

"I want sixty."

"Sixty, then."

Joan tried again. "What I meant was how long can you stay?"

"The whole sixty, if you like."

Joan jostled her and the sweetness of their bodies pressing together nearly swamped her senses. "Be serious, I need to know when you have to be back in Chicago."

"Never, as far as I can foresee." A confiding smile slowly claimed Cailen's features. "Joan, I have a rough idea of what went on here day before yesterday, albeit solely through Lara's version. That must have been some scene." She considered thoughtfully for a moment, taking her time, not realizing Joan hadn't drawn a breath since hearing that Cailen never had to go back. "The thought of you going through something so sordid woke me up good. The morning after she came in spouting off the whole mess, I signed the house over to her and left SoliSoft with an understanding that I may consider doing some programming for them, but only if I can do it from right here." Cailen nearly went into more detail about that prospect, but dismissed it for the moment. "You and I will have to discuss that when the time comes. Anyway," she blew out a long breath, "I'm home for good." She forced a sorrowful look onto her glowing face. "My dowry is reduced by half the sale price of the house, sorry. Don't worry, though, I can still go halves on Penny."

Desired and longed for as it was, the news presented a lot to absorb. Absolutely without warning, Joan cracked. She clung to Cailen and cried a deep, shoulder shaking, sob gulping, all-purpose cry—for Jade, for Brie's loss, for Lara's nastiness, and for the glorious relief of having Cailen back in her arms.

When the outburst shuddered to a rough halt, Cailen's soothing, "I'm here. I've got you," swerved Joan's emotions in another direction and for a while there was renewed energy behind her tears. This second wave of weeping, no longer in the convulsive category, played itself out evenly and dwindled gradually to a smooth stop.

Joan loosened her clench on Cailen and drew back to reveal a tear-washed smile. "I think I'm finished now."

"You sure? I'm not going anywhere and my shoulder won't melt, you know."

Joan shook her head, which was clogged to a density beyond her experience. "No, that'll do it for another twenty years or so, thanks." She laid her hand across her forehead, but smiled. "Guess we should get out there and say goodbye to Brie and Hannah." Joan's smile really did come out from behind the clouds then. "The sooner we do, the sooner I'll have you alone in the truck, and then home."

A discussion of logistics might be just the thing right now, Cailen thought. "Yeah, the truck. I'll need to drive mine home. We'll have to separate for the ride because a few of my nearest and dearest pieces of equipment have the cab jam-packed from ceiling to floorboard."

Part of Joan's attention was straying to the tissues she kept in the side desk drawer, and she was weighing whether getting one was worth letting go of Cailen. "Computers?"

"Sex toys."

Laughing made Joan’s need to blow her nose more critical. "It’s so lame when you try to be shocking."

"Okay, it's computer equipment—two towers, a scanner, my laptop, a large flat panel, all my personal digital devices, and a printer. The very minimum that I cannot do without."

Joan had retrieved a Kleenex and felt much better after blowing her nose. "I really have ended up with a geek, haven't I?"

"Before long, you won't be able to remember how you ever survived without your own personal geek around the house."

One more blow and Joan was ready to go, but she paused to ask, "Where does all the snot come from so immediately when you cry, I wonder? Is it always sitting in a reservoir somewhere, or does your body have to generate it that fast?"

Cailen guided their way to the door with a reassuring arm across Joan's shoulders. "After I'm set up, we'll check that on the Internet."

*****

The big door finally separated them from the outside world about an hour after Joan's torrent. Having secured Cailen's tech toys in what would become her study upstairs and agreed on the best configuration for parking their trucks along the alley behind the backyard, they were finally ready to settle in. And it was Cailen's turn to have an incongruous response. She dearly wanted to eat.

When they ended up in each others' arms on the stair landing, she meekly admitted, "If anybody would have tried to tell me I'd be home this long without getting you into bed, I'd have said they were deranged."

"But?"

"But I have this overpowering desire to sit across the kitchen table from you and eat food, a lot of food."

Joan took her hand, saying, "In the grand scheme of sixty years, why not?" and led her downstairs and through the kitchen's swinging saloon-style doors, where they overdid it on massive cream cheese veggie sandwiches, homemade butter asparagus soup, french fried sweet potatoes, beer, and big hunks of the leftover caramel cake experiment.

Cailen rocked her chair onto its back legs and held her belly. "I haven't felt this particular brand of miserable since we left Calabash Bob's that morning, remember?"

Joan patted her own stomach. "Coin flip or no coin flip, I couldn't drive right now to save my life."

"No way."

Anchored to the chairs by their intemperateness, they luxuriated in passing another little easy while there in the kitchen, spoiling themselves with conversation that was, at last, not edged in deferred solace. All those bleak months full of internal pep talks and heavy phone calls began the long process of fading from memory. Meanwhile, the future sketched, shaded, and painted portraits of itself, forming mental pictures that time would cure into memories. Everything either woman needed or wanted in that particular moment, however, sat exactly one kitchen table-width away.


© 2006 Margo Moon

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Grand Theft Equine - Chapter Twenty-Two: Rough Riding

Previous chapters are available on the sidebar.




January got going with a whopper of a snowstorm. Fourteen inches of snow is downright entombment for a Southern city with no elevation to speak of. So the horses got two extra days of walking. Joan said it was a good thing they were supposed to be relaxing anyway. By the third day, maintenance had the track in good enough shape for training to resume.

The start of Brie's classes was delayed, too, but Hannah made her study anyway, or at least she lobbied for it. Brie had her own ideas about how to spend the found time.

Relaxing at the tiny kitchen table in Hannah’s apartment one snowy afternoon, Brie got up the nerve to mention the shadow that had been hovering between them. "You know, we never did get around to talking about why I couldn't look at you the day Jade left. You said you had a theory?"

Hannah was at the top of a footstool, snipping oregano from a high-hanging window planter. She stepped down and spread her fragrant harvest on a towel to dry. "The theory couldn't be simpler. You keep me at arm's length, Brie." Hannah raised her chin to intercept Brie's dissent. "It's not an accusation, I swear it isn't." She nailed her with a settling look. "You never expected me to come along, and now that I’m here, I'm going to screw up your program, or so you think. That’s why you work real hard to preserve this status quo we've established. But like I always tell you, Brie, it won't hold. We're meant to be together. The day Jade left, emotions were so high, I wanted with my whole heart to hold you, for both our sakes. You couldn't have handled it though, because something might give. The feelings I know you have too, might have cut loose. So you couldn't acknowledge me." Hannah stirred the spaghetti sauce the oregano was destined for. "Look at us though, Brie, together constantly because neither of us feels right anywhere else. And as far as me messing up your career plans, who feeds you, makes you study extra, does everything humanly possible to help you with school? Weird as it seems, because I've always looked out for numero uno—was that Spanish?"

"Not really."

"Self-serving as I've always been, doing those things for you makes me happier than I've ever been in my life. And there's no sex. Great goddess in heaven, we aren’t even making love." Hannah scoffed.

Brie stared at her hands for a long time, as long as it took for Hannah to cook the pasta and get their meal on the table. When they were seated to eat, she finally spoke. "You have had more patience with me than anybody should ever ask for. I am going to admit that you unnerve me. We agree completely on what you said about not feeling right when we are apart. That, alone, terrifies me." They ate for a while until Brie added, "You know, I try to figure out what you get out of our relationship and I come up with very little. There are years and years of hard work and schooling in my future. You should be living life, having fun."

Hannah fluttered her eyelashes mockingly. "I don't want to be happy, I want to be with you," she whined. Then she shook her head while slowly chewing a piece of garlic bread and washing it down with a sip of wine. "Someday you'll get it, Brie, one of these days you're finally going to hear what I've been telling you. And all I've got to say is, you better be worth the wait."

That was the line Hannah usually closed such discussions with, although this one had gone further and been more candid than any of their earlier talks.

Brie used her napkin. "That was delicious. Let's go borrow the sled I saw in your parents' garage and take it to the park."

After a quick check of the clock and brief consideration, Hannah allowed, "We can sled for just a little while, on the condition you promise to work on your first reading for at least an hour when we get back. Come on, Brie, you've got the syllabus and the books, why not get a jump on the semester?"

After snatching the sled, which Hannah couldn't believe Car hadn't beaten them to, they picked their way along the three blocks to Cherokee Park through deep, fluffy snow. "Hannah?"

"Brisada."

Insulated by a snow-blanketed ground and ice-coated trees, Brie's chuckle didn't roll far. "Cracks me up when you say my name that way." She breathed the cold dry air deeply. "I was thinking, it might be good if I bring my things over to the apartment and start paying half the expenses. Not that I'd give up the room. It's too convenient having a base right there in the barn, for both of us, don't you think?"

Hannah did what it took to not sound as ecstatic as she felt. "Definitely. No need whatsoever for you to give up the room. No need at all. But you'll move in? Actually move in?"

Brie looked corralled by her own suggestion. "If you're still offering the spare room."

"Heck, yeah. And forget about the expenses." Hannah caught an obstinate shift in the angle of Brie's head and shoulders, and immediately retreated. "Okay, you pay half."

*****

Forgoing Hialeah had been a sound decision, judging by the gloss on the horses and the lighthearted, energetic humor of almost everyone at Caulder Stables come the beginning of April. January's much talked about blizzard had set the tone for the remainder of that winter, making it a good one for laying low, and the weather's earlier ferocity made April's color and thaw even more precious than most years. When spring hit, Joan's stunned disbelief at passing another change of season without Cailen was the sole shadow on an otherwise idyllic return to verdancy and warmth.

And warm it did get, very early. That first week of April, a full month before the Derby, quickened everyone with sunny seventy-five-degree afternoons. Just after training on one of those unseasonable days, Joan noticed a woman, technically attractive, not really Brie’s type, standing in DotCom’s doorway yammering in slow hissing spurts. For having been, in the days before Hannah, so generous with invitations to the room, Brie had been darn good at averting misunderstandings. Over the years, there had been impressively few scenes like the one Joan imagined to be shaping up at that moment. Brie could spot clingy from a furlong away. Nonetheless, Joan surmised that the incident currently unfolding must be the upshot of some former escapade gone wrong.

Leaving them to the privacy of their quarrel, Joan had one foot on the single step-up to the office when Cailen’s name jutted up like jagged ice through the smooth surface of the woman’s modulated broadside. Joan halted to pay more attention. This hot-shit person had packed herself snugly into jeans and a scoopy top that stretched across scrunched, upward and inward, breasts. Definitely not Brie’s type.

Her volume picked up, pumped louder by growing anger. “Huh, Brie? Won’t answer me will you? What’s the matter, all of a sudden too classy to discuss personal matters?” She fumed as Brie remained silent, then finally commanded, “I said say something!”

Brie commented lazily, “Those jeans make your butt look big.”

“Too late to change this with your stupid idea of humor, Brie. Too late. I know you’re behind Cailen coming home full of ideas about selling our home. Everybody knows what a good fuck you and Cailen have always found each other to be. Oh, yeah, the legendary Cailen and Brie, friends who can fuck and still stay friends.” Lara stopped to catch breath and snarl a vengeful smile. “Cailen admitted you fucked her last meet, Brie. Yeah, she told me all about it, the way you got her crazy by saying how much you always loved doing her standing up because of how sexy it is the way her jeans fall open and away from her hips.” Lara mocked with faux Mexican accent, “After that, Cailita, I could not help myself.” She laughed as that remark changed Brie's casual disposition. “That is sexy, isn’t it? Always makes me hot, too.”

Enjoying her well executed course reversal and newfound leverage, Lara pressed forward against the webbing to showcase her cavernous cleavage and spoke with forced coolness now. “To tell the truth, you’ve accidentally done us a favor. Screwing around on me has helped Cailen wake up, like we’re in the same league again or something. We’re back together and it’s never been better. So, I probably ought to thank you, Brie. Fucking you for a couple of weeks has sent Cailen running right back to my bed, where she belongs.”

Joan was suddenly directly behind her, wearing a noncommittal smile. “You must be Lara.”

Lara pivoted, flipping her long brown braid over one shoulder and taking care not to turn her back on Brie completely. Her eyes flitted to Joan’s. “That’s right.” Until she could assess Joan’s relevance, she tempered her tone and managed a tight smile.

Joan’s smile was quite broad then, as she offered her hand and said, “I’m Joan Caulder, Brie’s fiancée.”

“Brie’s what? Caulder? As in Caulder Stables, I guess?” Lara glanced up at the big C on DotCom’s stall plaque.

“That’s correct, you’re in my shedrow.” Then turning to Brie and oozing attentiveness, Joan said, “Brie, darling, what’s going on here?”

Lara wasn't about to shut up. “I’ll tell you what’s going on here. Your intended has been fucking my girlfriend. She tried to wreck a happy home and a long-term relationship.” Lara paused and her wits accumulated some. “How did you know my name?”

“I recognized you as someone from Cailen’s past.” Joan entered the stall and claimed a spot next to Brie, putting a possessive arm across her shoulder.

“Why would Cailen discuss me with you?”

“Because you are her past and I plan on being her future.” Joan kissed Brie’s cheek for extra effect.

Hannah picked up on Joan’s tack as she eavesdropped two stalls away. At the point where Hannah entered DotCom’s stall to join Joan and Brie, Lara was still merely wary and mildly confused. Hannah put her arms around Brie and helped herself to a deep, unhurried kiss, then leaned back, still smiling at Brie, into Joan’s unsuspecting arms. Hannah thought, What the hell, not many chances like this, and spun around to claim a comparable kiss from Joan.

“When are we going home, babies? I’m starving.” Hannah made Joan continue to hold her.

By the power of some miracle, none of them laughed, even as they watched Lara puff way up and turn very red.

Joan said, “Hannah, uh darling, this is Lara.”

Hannah’s creamy blue eyes widened. “Hey, has Cailen unloaded that house yet? I can’t tell you how much we miss our beautiful Cailen.”

Spit foam actually flew from her mouth when Lara yelled, “Bunch of fucking racetrack trash!”

Hannah produced some real tears before burying her face in Joan’s breasts. Her muffled lament went, “Joan, you make us all so happy, why can’t people just accept us?”

That did it. Lara was done, and her stomp from the shedrow followed by slammed car door and tire-churned gravel sort of implied she wouldn’t be back.

Brie and Hannah beamed broad grins over their farce. All the color in Joan’s face had drained away once Lara was gone, but she smiled weakly back at them.

“You guys were wonderful. Sharp girl, Hannah.”

“Bet we won’t be seeing that one back here anytime soon.”

“Probably not. Thanks again, both of you. Brie, tell Car I’ve gone home for the day, will you?” Joan was done in.

“Sure.”
“Bye, then.” Joan spent her last smile of the morning as she poked her head back into the stall to say, “Very nice kiss, Hannah.”

“My pleasure.”

When the sound of Joan’s truck had fully faded, Brie finally explained, “Hearing all that vindictiveness aimed at Cailen was too abrasive for her.”

Hannah took in a deep breath, because she had a few words to use it on. “Brie, you’re just four years older than me. Why do you treat me like a child? I don’t need to be told it was hard for her to hear that stuff. And it wasn’t just the content, it was the crudeness, too. I wasn’t all that crazy about the content or the crudeness, myself. I mean, you and Cailen, when you and I haven’t even, yet. Sure, one thing to know you were together, another to hear somebody making up details about it.” Too in love to really be angry, Hannah winked at Brie on her way out of the stall.

Brie caught Hannah’s sleeve. “Very nice kiss, Hannah.”

Gracias. Wish I knew the Spanish for ‘there’s lots more where that came from.’”

“I can teach you that. Maybe when we get home this evening?”

Knowing Brie was no tease, had never so much as led Hannah to think they were on the verge of even kissing, Hannah couldn’t remember a single thing about doing up the rest of her horses that morning. She spent the day so flustered, it was almost a relief later when, after feed time, Brie said she needed to go to Joan’s for a talk first, but would be home in a couple of hours. Hannah could sure use that time to regroup.

*****

On the suspicion that Joan was bound to be cooking up a storm, Brie went around to the kitchen door. All the windows were open and even the warm air out on the back porch was loaded down with baking smells. The screen door clapped dully when Brie knocked on its frame. She was all brown eyes and concern through the silvery sheen of the screen. Joan undid the latch with her elbow instead of putting down the big bowl she was stirring something in.

When the door latch rattled loose, Brie let herself in. “We need to discuss something Lara said.”

Joan was heading back to her work area, tending to the bowl. “No, Brie, we do not. It was an ugly, deceitful episode that’s best left unexamined. I’ve dismissed everything said about you as well as about Cailen, so don’t concern yourself over it.” With a flourish, Joan scraped out one last gob of cake mix and brightly offered Brie the coated bowl and spoon. “Here you go, just in time to lick the batter.”

Brie was too close to nausea to want it, but accepted anyway because that’s what she would normally have done. She caught Joan with a long, sobering look. “My conscience will not let us ignore one part of Lara’s nasty speech. What she said about how I seduced Cailen.” Brie paused to rid her hands, which needed their freedom for gesturing, of the sticky utensils.

“You and I have been over this, Brie. I’m not the least bit bothered by anything you and Cailen did before she and I got together. Anyway, Lara was merely making a good guess about that.”

Brie folded her arms and wished with all her heart she didn’t have to say what had to come next. “Joan, that’s the problem. It wasn’t a guess. She had word-for-word, accurate details from a very private conversation between Cailen and me. No way Lara could have gotten lucky enough to invent it, using my exact words.”

“Which exact words?”

“Cailen’s jeans falling open and all that.”

“Cailen would never have repeated such an intimate exchange, Brie. And she has not touched that creature since going back. How could you believe Cailen’s capable of any of this?”

“I don’t, but I’m having a hard time dismissing it, too. All I’m saying is we need to talk about it.” Brie had imagined Joan would be as heartsick and baffled as she was over the enormous weight of evidence that Cailen had, at the very least, been confiding in Lara on a deep level.

Joan proceeded to work while saying, “Well, little lawyer woman, let’s dissect this situation objectively. Would your evidence against Cailen be considered hearsay or circumstantial?”

“Hearsay, in that Lara is recounting something she was told was said. She did not personally take part in our conversation.” There was a brief pause while Brie thought. “But circumstantial in that she’s claiming Cailen’s disclosure makes it believable that they’re back together.”

Joan smiled. “So, your circumstantial evidence is based on hearsay. Pretty damn weak, counselor. Come back when you get something better than that.” Joan buttered some muffin cups as she added, “But to tell you the truth, Lara could stroll in here armed with a graphic video and her story would still be a pantload as far as I’m concerned.”

Brie picked up the bowl of drying batter and ran a finger through the streaks that were still gooey. “This is good, what is it and when will it be done?”

“A caramel cake I’ve been meaning to try ever since New Year’s Day fell through. The timer should go off in about twenty minutes. Why? Do you think I’ll actually share with someone who doubted Cailen like that?”

Still not convinced there was no cause for concern, but conceding that she’d jumped the gun somewhat, Brie shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe you shouldn’t reward me, because I'd still like to hear any credible explanation of how Lara knew all that.”

Joan’s focus on the food hadn’t wavered in the slightest and she pulled her face back from opening the oven door, saying resolutely, “We don’t need a credible explanation. We have our faith in Cailen.” Oven shut, end of discussion.

*****

Joan had a single, concise question for Brie when they’d settled at the desk with their coffee the following morning. “Where did you seduce Cailen?”

Brie blinked to make the vertigo stop. “What?”

Calmly, firmly, Joan rephrased. “Exactly where were you and Cailen located when the words Lara repeated so precisely were spoken?”

“In Knucklehead’s stall. Why?”

“Near the rear wall, I’ll venture.” Joan’s smile was both tender and triumphant at the thought of vindicating Cailen to Brie.

“The back corner closest to this end, yes.”

“Then I have your credible explanation—yours, not mine. I don’t need one.”

Appalled that Jimmy had been spying for Sassy and impressed with Joan’s deductions, which were absolutely plausible, Brie let go of her doubts about Cailen and repackaged her turbid responses into indignation that Joan had kept such juicy knowledge, the whole story of Jimmy being Sassy’s informant, to herself for more than two years.

Joan was exultant, as she qualified, “Not exclusively to myself, Car knows and Cailen knows.”

“Car? But not me?”

Painstakingly, Joan laid out her reasoning of the matter. “Car had to know so he and I could use Jimmy to our benefit. We’ve solidly established with Sassy, through intentionally leaked bits we’ve allowed Jimmy to hear, that Car supports Sassy’s opinions, even that he thinks I’m a fool to rebuff her advances.”

It was all far too interesting for Brie to maintain her tiff. Any ploy designed to foil Sassy was fine with her. And relief over Cailen’s exoneration was sinking in.

“An extra cup, okay? And even if we’re late getting started, tell me everything. Please?” Brie lilted over to the coffee stand, laughing. “This is huge.” She served them and took her seat. “First, why put Car on Farms’ good side?”

“So she’ll be likely to turn the string over to him in the event she pushes me too far someday and I have to break ties with her. That way, I’d have the comfort of knowing the horses are in good hands. Through Car, I would at least still have a link to them.” The part of her original reasoning that Joan didn’t mention was that if Car took over, he could have probably seen to it that Brie wasn’t separated from Jade.

Hannah popped in and gave Brie a significant nod. The look they exchanged reminded Joan of that rainy morning Hannah had first shown up, when Joan had finally walked away from the way they were making eyes at each other.

Brie took the meaning of Hannah’s nod and scrambled to her feet, saying, “Okay, let me go down and tie Thunder to the wall for you.” On her way out, she gave Hannah a kiss that was unmistakably of the morning after variety.

Joan forgot to be afraid of being alone in the room with a menstruating Hannah. She slumped into her chair. “My God, don’t tell me! That had to be the longest case of foreplay in history.”

Hannah ran both hands through her hair. “Yeah, tell me about it.”


© 2006 Margo Moon

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Grand Theft Equine - Chapter 21: Holiday Card

Previous chapters are available on the sidebar.


Christmas had not been far ahead when Jade left. It was traditional for all the Caulder horses to walk on Christmas morning and Joan tried her best to have the entire staff out of there before ten, with orders to stay gone until the following morning. Another tradition was for her and Brie to work off Christmas dinner by coming back and doing an abbreviated afternoon feed, just the two of them, all thirty horses. Afterward, they would sequester themselves at Joan's house with leftovers, a bottle of hundred-proof Wild Turkey and enough eggnog to make it slide down easy. Brie always stayed overnight in the guest bedroom.

Joan was cleaning her fifth stall of the morning, the one of Charles' situated next to Hannah's end stall and they were speaking through the wall. "Are you sure you can't get away from your parents' celebration for at least a short while, Hannah? There's plenty of food, believe me." Once again, Hannah had bowed aside to avoid interfering with Joan and Brie's customs.

"Brie and I have all the rest of our Christmases to spend together. You two enjoy each other." She was careful not to mention that thereafter Joan and Cailen would be initiating new holiday customs of their own. That would have pointed up Cailen's current absence.

Joan was getting used to both Hannah's confidence that she and Brie would be together forever and her cheerful ready willingness to say so. "Well then, if you won't drop by later, be sure to meet me in the office before you leave so I can give you your gift."

"Yours is in the car." Hannah came over to poke her head in Joan's stall. "It might be overstepping. If you don't like it will you please say so?"

"I've felt the same way about yours, that it might be overstepping. You say so too, if it is."

The number of horses being walked was thinning out and as grooms finished getting done up, most of them found Joan to wish her a happy holiday and thank her again for the generous bonus. Soon, the shedrow was quiet and down to the horses, Brie, Hannah and Joan. Hannah made one last rundown of the water, hay, halter, and door checklist for each of her horses. Satisfied that all were secure, comfortable, and happy, she jogged over to her car for Joan's gift.

A gold envelope, caught around its middle with thin red ribbon, sat in front of Joan there at her desk. Hannah backed into the office carrying a box wrapped in Sunday funnies with a huge shiny blue bow stuck on top. Before the door shut all the way, Brie called out to hold it open for a second as she lugged through with the big green, red, blue and silver box, tied with a bow made of hay twine, that held Joan's refurbished tack box. Each of them suddenly seized up with powerful doubts about their gifts, which brought escalated excitement and something akin to nervous chatter from all three.

Hannah broke the spell. "Like I said, Joan, you might have no interest whatsoever in this. But I was just thinking about how much energy it takes to be you every day."

"Well, you're probably going to think I've got a lot of nerve—wait, if I say anything else, you won't even need to unwrap it."

Brie tapped the big package. "It looks like we skimped on the wrapping, but you'll see the reason for the twine in a minute. Won't she, Hannah?"

Then everybody's wheels jammed up again for a few seconds.

Joan's hand shot the envelope forward. "You first, Hannah."

With obvious intent to save it, Hannah opened the envelope. Her face went so blank, those soft blue eyes giving nothing away, Joan was left dangling for the longest moment. The first active response was Hannah's question to Brie. "Did you know about this?"

She could tell Hannah was moved. "Joan would give me no clues. Hurry, what is it?"

"Incredible. Spanish lessons. Unbelievable, Joan, I don't know what to say."

"Pretty soon you will, en Español. So will I. If it's not too presumptuous, we can go to class together. I'm enrolled too."

"That's about the only thing that could have made this better. Thank you, I mean it."

Brie's hands went to her hips. "You are taking away the one strategic advantage Cailen and I have over you? Not fair."

"We're not going for fair, are we Joan?"

"What would be the point?"

Brie nudged the hay twine box. "This one next, Joan."

There was a card shoved beneath the knotted twine bow, so Joan opened that first and read aloud. "To Joan. Love, Hannah and Brie."

Hannah's eyes darted to Brie's. They'd agreed to make this gift from Brie alone, or at least Hannah thought they had. Brie did a so-sue-me shrug.

Joan performed the obligatory weight-checking rattle of the box, followed by the usual mystified expression, before unwrapping it with purpose. At first she truly forgot or, rather, failed to maintain awareness that anyone else was in the room. The incongruity of seeing it in this setting, the sheer familiarity of the old wooden case and a thousand memories it had been part of, whacked a catch into her breath. By its handle, which she had gripped over miles and miles of crossing her pastures seeking out her horses for grooming, she lifted the faithfully mended relic. She had to stare at it a few seconds before Brie and Hannah re-materialized.

"You guys, my groom box." Her hands roamed reverently across the surface as she lapsed into recollection of days gone by. "I'm sorry, am I acting like someone being interviewed following a natural disaster or winning the lottery, or something? Because that's how taken aback I am."

"That tells us nothing. Do you like it?"

"You could have no idea how much. Really, no idea. Thank you both, with all my heart. I can’t wait for Cailen to see it. Did she know about this?"

They shook their heads, smiling big time over their coup.

"Okay, okay, I'm getting hungry. We can't spend the whole day on one present." Brie avoided sentimentality like it was quicksand.

Hannah waved her hand graciously toward the funny papers box. "Ms. Caulder."

"Another one for me? Too much, Hannah, really." This one was filled with an assortment of vitamin bottles and supplement containers. "Aw, you want to keep me around for a good long time, don't you?"

"Like I said, you might not care to take up a deliberate regimen like this."

"Oh, but I do. Just never had time to shop for these and be faithful about taking them, that's all." Joan was removing items for individual inspection. "Fully digestible calcium, yes, water soluble vitamin E, yes, slow release iron, yes, glucosamine with chondroitin, yes. What's black cohosh for?"

"Menstrual difficulties."

Joan pitched that bottle to Hannah. "For all our sakes, you double up."

"Hey, no fair."

In one voice, Brie and Joan sing-songed, "We're not going for fair."

"Funny. Ha ha. Read the card, Joan."

Joan dug around under the packing materials, found it, read it, and fixed Brie with a cocky look while addressing Hannah. "You'll be packaging mine every day, just like you do Brie's? Excellent."

Joan was the last one to leave, right after Brie and Hannah had set out for home to shower and change. She was removing her key ring from its hook when the sound of a powerful diesel engine grew very loud before shutting down right outside. The truck was awesome, but it was nothing compared with the eight-horse trailer attached to it, which was maroon with white trim, and had a familiar C tastefully gracing each side. ‘Caulder Stables’ was emblazoned over the front. A big man with a haircut that made his head look blocky and huge shoulders that swallowed his neck was already unhitching the trailer in the time it had taken Joan to come from the office. A Rolls Royce pulled up beside the truck, with Sassy exiting it before her chauffeur could set the brake and get around to her door.

Sassy stood facing the trailer, rapturously appreciating its appearance. She whirled around at the sound of Joan’s surprised, “What on Earth!”

“I was so concerned the color wouldn’t exactly match your awnings and truck, but they do, don’t you think, Joan? They go perfectly, don’t they?” Sassy’s attention returned to the long-awaited sight of the trailer sitting next to Joan’s truck, just outside Joan’s barn, and she took in a long breath of satisfaction. She whispered, “It’s as if it has been here all along.”

Sassy’s Rolls had moved off to a discreet distance and the diesel was gone.

Painfully aware that this must be Sassy’s Christmas gift to her, and needing some time to come up with how she could diplomatically refuse it, Joan said, “Merry Christmas, Sassy.”

Real tears pooled in Sassy’s eyes. “Oh! Merry Christmas, Joan.” Almost taking Joan’s hand but stopping short, as if sticking to some resolve, Sassy took a few enthusiastic steps toward the trailer. “Please come look inside.” When Joan didn’t follow, Sassy’s next, “Please,” was so artless Joan didn’t have the heart not to join her.

The rig was extraordinary. Sassy explained the amenities in great detail, pulling down the hideaway cots and pullout awning, which also bore the Caulder colors, and running down all the safety features for the horses. The shock absorbent suspension was beyond her, but she dug out the owner’s manual from her enormous purse, assuring Joan the whole thing was described fully in it, on page forty-eight. And while she had her purse open, she handed over the title, license, and insurance papers, all taken care of.

Without giving pause for Joan to speak, she pulled out a bundle of envelopes. “And these. Joan, how many employees are on the payroll here these days?”

What a question to have pop up in the midst of all the trailer hoopla. Joan unconsciously rolled her shoulders, trying to loosen up. “Payroll. I believe there are eighteen at the moment.”

Sassy thrust the entire stack of envelopes at her. “Good. There are twenty cash bonuses here, so everyone should be covered. I think Brie should have—” She surveyed the empty parking area and tranquil shedrow, seeming to notice them for the first time. “Has everyone gone already?”

Joan nodded. “We try to wrap it up early on Christmas morning.”

“I guess one more day won’t make much difference. Please give one of those to each employee and I think the two extra should go to Brie, to help with tuition. She is the best groom around, you’ve said it many times.”

Joan fanned the bonuses. “This is very nice of you, Sassy. I’ll be happy to give them out tomorrow. But we need to discuss the trailer.” They were standing inside it, and Joan made a broad motion.

Sassy looked desperate. “Please don’t refuse it, please.”

“But it’s extravagant, too much.”

“Allow me to make my case before you decide. When you brought that horse to Camden last month you had to borrow the veterinarian’s trailer. Joan, I don’t want you to do without anything you need, anything. The thought of it distracts me no end. A woman, a trainer like you should have everything first class.”

Joan nodded. “True, I did borrow Anna’s trailer to ship Penny, but that was an isolated instance. How often do I trailer horses myself? Almost never.”

Folding her hands as if about to pray, but indulging in a secretive smile, Sassy spilled what she considered the big beans. “That may be about to change. Joan, this fall Rainier Farms purchased the most well-bred horse in its history. Corporate Governance. I believe Mag showed him to you when you were in Camden?”

“He’s a very fine specimen, that’s for sure.”

Sassy shivered. “May we finish discussing this in your office?”

“Sure, sorry, I forgot about the cold. Of course, come on.”

There’d been a time when Joan abhorred being alone with Sassy, but for weeks her come-on attitude had been absent in favor of a professional, albeit friendly, owner-trainer demeanor that Joan found infinitely more tolerable.

When they were seated with the desk between them, Sassy took up where they’d quit. “Corporate Governance is more than a fine specimen. Joan, I’ve always dreamed of you running a horse in the Kentucky Derby. He might be the one. Even Mag doesn’t dispute it. I want to send him to you as soon as you think he’s ready, or better yet, you come to Camden and pick him up personally. And I want you to have the means to move him or any of the other horses back and forth from track to farm, whenever you see fit. To do that, with a horse that might one day win the Derby, I think you should have the best transportation possible. You should have the best, Joan.”

Joan furtively checked the clock. Good God, Brie’s going to get there and find me not home yet. “Sassy, I don’t know where to start with all the reasons why I cannot keep that trailer.”

“Good, then don’t. Just accept it.” Sassy dropped her smile and said, looking down at her hands, folded in her lap. “I’m trying to start all over Joan. I want you to like me, as a friend. Mag says for that to happen you have to respect me first. I’ve been working very hard on being someone you can respect.”

“You can’t buy friends, Sassy. We can be friends without the trailer.”

Sassy stood and paced. “I was afraid you’d think it was a bribe. It isn’t. Look, the trailer is here, and I will admit I asked, I can’t remember his name right now, the man who drove it here, anyway I asked him to unhitch and leave right away, because I want you to at least think about keeping it. Will you just think about it? Call Mag, see if she doesn’t think you’ll probably need it now that Corporate Governance is coming along so nicely. He’ll have to ship all over for the races he’ll need before the Derby. If you can find no other grounds for keeping the trailer, we could always consider it a bonus for this past meet. Everybody’s talking about our performance here, you know.”

The quickest way to get out of there and home before Brie arrived was to say yes, so she did. “It’s a conditional acceptance, Sassy, I mean it. I have to think this over. Now, most of Christmas dinner is ready, just needs to be put in the oven for an hour or two. And there’s more than enough food to make Brie and me miserable from overeating, so would you like to come back to the house for dinner?” Brie will kill me dead.

“Thank you very much, but the plane is waiting to take me back. Do you believe twenty people are due at the farm in less than three hours and I’m standing here in Louisville?”

“Somehow, since it’s you, I do believe it.” Joan shook her head at Sassy’s uncertainty over how to take that. She smiled as she ushered them to the door. “Just practicing this concept of us being friends, Sassy. I have a habit of trading barbs with all my friends, take it or leave it.”

Casting one last proud glance over Joan’s trailer before stepping into the Rolls, Sassy looked the picture of peaceful contentment.

*****

Christmas dinner was eaten, chores were done, the fireplace had flickered to idle, and half the eggnog was gone. The time-honored moment for Joan to propose to Brie was upon them.

Joan began with, "Do you believe in polygamy?"

"No. Do you?

Heavy sigh. "No."

"So what do we do now?"

"About me proposing?"

"Yes."

"I'm not sure." Joan got up and held out a hand for Brie's glass. "Finish that last bit and I'll get refills. We need more inspiration to figure things out this year."

"Amen."

Joan's phone, which she'd laid on the table next to her end of the sofa, rang, bringing her flying back from the kitchen. "Hi, angel," she said, breathless.

"Do you mean to tell me there's someone you're calling angel and we don't even know her yet? It's not Brie, because she's there with you, right? Joan?"

"Hi, Mom."

Brie clamped a hand over her mouth and left the room.

"So? Miles, did you know our daughter has someone she's serious enough about to be calling angel?"

"Mom, you'll meet her as soon as can be arranged. She has to be away from Louisville for a while, but as soon as she gets back, we'll be out, I promise."

"What does Brie think? Honey, you know we always hoped you and Brie would end up together."

"So you've told me. Brie and Cailen go way back and Brie's crazy about her. Is that good?"

"The name's Cailen, Miles. I guess it'll have to do for now, honey. We just called to wish you Merry Christmas and make sure you're still coming here for New Year's."

"Merry Christmas to you, too. Yes, I'm still planning to be there. I'll bring the dessert this time. There's a cake I've been meaning to try. Tell Dad it's full of caramel."

"He'll be in his glory. We know you're allergic to phones, so we won't keep you. We love you, Joan."

"I love you too, Mom. And I'm building a slight tolerance to these things, so go ahead and put Dad on."

"Miles, she wants to speak to her daddy."

"Hello, dear. Hope we haven't abused the fact that you had to give us your number."

"Hi, Dad. No, it's fine. Actually, it's wonderful hearing from you all. Call anytime, I mean it. Tell Mom, too."

"You and Brie must be pretty far into the eggnog. Better wait and see if you want to stick by that statement when the bourbon wears off. Love you, honey, and Merry Christmas. Be sure to give Brie our love."

"Deal. Love you too, and Merry Christmas. See you for New Year's."

Brie brought the drinks in as soon as the connection was closed.

"Deserter." Joan accepted her eggnog and took a discerning sip. "Firm yet strong."

Brie tried hers and nodded. "Stout yet hefty." She nestled back into her spot and defended herself. "It wasn't desertion, I just didn't want to be cracking up where they could hear me. How did they get your number, anyway?"

Joan's dismissive gesture overshot on disinterest. "Now that I have the phone, it's not right to keep the number from them."

He would never have wished her to be unhappy, so the glazed absence that passed over Brie's face was brief. "Jade."

"Yes." Joan squeezed Brie's ankle. "Hey, did I ever tell you how much my parents have always wanted you and me to be girlfriends?"

"No. Really?"

"It's true. Just now, Mom used my news about Cailen to reiterate that they have always thought we'd end up with each other."

"They're so good." Brie studied the fire. "Have you ever wondered why we haven't?"

Joan laughed and consulted the ceiling. "Dozens of times. Actually, I made a pass at you once, when we first knew each other."

"Impossible."'

"Possible."

"When?"

"Back when you were working at the farm. I stopped by the main barn looking for Mag, but she wasn't anywhere around. You were resetting the dressing on a little black colt with a foot abscess. You'd come back to soak it an extra time."

Fully interested, Brie strained to remember. "Oh, yeah, Bungee Chord. He was a good little boy. Mag sent him out with the West Coast string."

"Anyway, I think we had met about three times by then. I hung around for over an hour, trying to work the conversation onto personal topics, but you stayed right on message. Just the horse particulars, ma'am, all business."

Brie did that deep belly chuckle of hers. "You mean that was your idea of making a pass? I swear to God, it's almost a miracle you've ever had a date, let alone been to bed with so many women."

"Hey, watch it."

"I'm serious about this." Her giggles didn't sound all that serious to Joan. "Did they all have ESP or something? Unbelievable. That was your conception of a pass. So sorry to have missed out. If I'd had any idea I'm sure something could have been arranged."

"Oh, yes, one more complication added to the you, Cailen, and me relationship would be handy."

Brie took a good swallow. "Woo, this one's going to knock me on my butt. Speaking of Cailen, is she calling here or are you calling there? And when?"

"We didn't say either way for sure." Joan checked the mantelpiece clock and sighed. "I've been putting it off because I don't want it to be over. Saying goodnight is always so difficult. Put your feet up here, I'll massage them for you."

"Oh, my God, pure indulgence." Brie drained her glass before obliging. "You know I'll be totally gone after this, right? Just leave me on the couch here."

Less than ten minutes of conspiracy between bourbon, lazy fire crackles, and a delicious foot massage did indeed manage to knock Brie on her butt. Joan was giving it a few more minutes on the feet to make sure she was totally under before calling Cailen. But Cailen beat her to it, and this time when the phone rang Joan took an extra second to check caller i.d.

"Hello, angel."

"Howdy."

"Howdy?"

"Yep, howdy."

"Okay, then. I miss you, how's it going up there?"

"I miss you too, no way to express how much. But we could try. Do you know anything about phone sex?"

"Whoa, girl, no Merry Christmas, no how was dinner? Anyway, Brie's right here, asleep at the end of the couch. Now, how did you spend Christmas day?"

"Working. I volunteered to take standby today, since everybody else wanted to make personal plans. Went off duty a couple of hours ago."

"Standby. That means you didn't actually go in, just stayed by the phone or something?"

"Yeah, didn't get one call, could have predicted that. Merry Christmas."

"Merry Christmas."

"How was dinner?"

"It turned out well. We were overstuffed as usual and hated the idea of getting out to do chores, but of course that's always the best cure for too much food."

"Great. Now, I think you're supposed to begin this with a wardrobe question. So, what are you wearing?"

Joan came very close to giggling. She whispered forcefully, "Cailen, I told you Brie is right here."

"Okay, what's she wearing?"

Joan set Brie's feet aside and shot off the couch. From the privacy of the kitchen, she asked, "Cailen, are you drinking?"

"A little eggnog, like you and Brie."

"How little?"

"Very little eggnog, lots of Wild Turkey. That's what you have, right?"

Joan made that sound again. "Right."

"You're giggling just like Brie."

"Yes, I heard that. I must be spending way too much time with her and Hannah."

"With who?"

"Brie and Hannah."

"Oh, right, Hannah. How's Brie doing, about Jade and everything?"

Joan paused to think back over the past weeks' transitions. "Jade's always there, but she's back to herself for the most part, at least on the surface. First thing in the morning is the most difficult part of the day for her, I believe. When the first set goes out his absence is so strongly felt, by all of us. But she's managing to be Brie."

"Always a trooper."

"Yes. How about you? I'm surprised about the bourbon, since you hate the way it tastes."

"I'm fine. Frustrated about no progress on the house."

"But that's going to change after the holidays. The house will sell and you'll be back and I'm never letting you leave again."

"Good. I hope you're right."

"What's the matter, angel, is there something else? People sell houses every day. It's going to happen."

"Hang on a second, I'm starting a pot of coffee." Sounds of running water and a cabinet shutting in the background had Joan taking pains to envision what Cailen's kitchen might look like, the sight of Cailen maneuvering in her very own kitchen.

"Godammit! Sorry, dropped the old grounds on the floor." Joan had never heard temper or profanity from Cailen. Not that she expected her to never exhibit either, but it was odd behavior, especially over something so piffling as spilled coffee grounds.

"There is more to it than simply selling the house, isn't there?"

"A little bit more, just annoying stuff. I'm sure when somebody makes a definite offer, everything’s going to iron out."

"What do you mean, 'when somebody makes an offer?' Of course that's what we're waiting for."

"No, I mean Lara is vowing she'll never sign to sell the house. I was so stupid, Joan. Her name is on the deed. We own it half and half."

"I didn't know she was back."

"For two days last week. I tried to be nice, civil, but she stormed through the door waving the For Sale sign, swearing up and down she'd never sign to sell." Cailen wasn't about to mention that Lara had thrown the sign at her, that one of its dirt-caked prongs had pierced the arm she'd put up to block her face, and had required three stitches plus a tetanus shot. "She thinks she can trap me here by not agreeing to sell."

"Two days. Is she gone now?"

"The next fit came when she discovered that I was staying in one of the extra bedrooms, with a latch on the inside of the door. That brought on a big tantrum and she went somewhere the next night. I haven't heard from her since."

"What a mess. Angel, maybe you should just let Lara have the house."

"I really think when it comes down to it, she's not going to be able to turn down half of the equity. Especially since she hasn't contributed anything to it. She'll be walking away with a good amount of cash, and I just don't see her turning that down." Cailen gratefully sipped her fresh-brewed coffee. "This is why I didn't want to get into this right now. Let's talk about good stuff, it's Christmas."

"Good stuff, let's see. I've made the decision about Hialeah. We're not shipping down there this year."

"Now that you've decided, I'll tell you what a relief that is to hear. Being five hours away is one thing, but I didn't know how we were going to handle living twenty-three hours apart. What made up your mind?"

"The success we've been having is a big part of it. We raced fairly heavily during the Churchill meet, and are shipping to Turfway once a week right now, having good results there, too."

"I know. Pepper's win the other day was pretty impressive. That filly has really moved up."

"Charles was awfully proud of her. Anyway, we've all, horses and people, been going at it hard for a few months now. I truly think the best course is to stay put, allow everybody to rest up, and be fresh for Churchill's spring meet. We've already far surpassed last year's earnings, so Sassy won't be disappointed. Neither should any of the other owners. My gut feeling is that if we keep pushing, we'll eventually hit a wall in the form of burnout or an injury. And there's no excuse for that. I told Brie this afternoon and she's overjoyed to be able to enroll here next semester instead of in Miami."

"I love you."

"And I love you. How's that coffee?'

"Good. Want some?"

"What I wouldn't give to be in a position to accept that offer!"

"Guess what? I just made a decision of my own."

"Tell me."

"To spend New Year's Eve and New Year's Day in Louisville. Somebody else's turn to do holiday standby."

"Are you certain? Please let's not plan this unless we can actually do it. You know, it's breaking our resolution to next see each other when it's for keeps, but that's been feeling more and more like a silly constraint." Joan took a breath. "I have to tone it down, or I'll wake Brie all the way in the other room."

"So it's a date? I get your first kiss of the New Year?"

"The first one, a couple million in between, and the last one. Then we start all over the next year."

"In that case, I'll definitely be there."

Joan put the leftovers in the fridge and turned out the kitchen light. "And speaking of kisses, night before last I had the most sentient dream about us kissing. We were in chest-high water, very warm, clear blue water. Like the ocean, only no waves. There were so many blues—the sky, the water, the horizon. Your eyes matched the water. Everything like crystal, but solid. Anyway, we stood facing each other in the water and the rules, you know how dreams sometimes have an understood, underlying organization?"

“Like you know the room you're in is the one you had when you were little, even though it's allowed to look different in the dream."

"Exactly. So in this one, the rules were that we could kiss, but only underwater. And we were fine with that, smiling and ducking under to kiss as long as possible before coming up for air. Sometimes you needed to come up first and some of the time I did. We got really good at telling when the other one needed to surface. At first we were fine with it, but then having to stop got frustrating." Joan was making her way through the house, securing the fireplace doors, putting a thick beige afghan over Brie, turning out lights in the upstairs hallway and bathroom, on her way to the bedroom. "At the same instant, we each realized that touching underwater was acceptable, so we continued to kiss and surface, but started a whole other level of intimacy below. The colors were so arresting, I can't begin to get across how stunning their effect was. They got all caught up in what we were doing. The more aroused we became, the more vivid the colors got." Joan closed the bedroom door behind her.

Cailen cleared her throat. "How did it end?"

"Let me just say that to the old question of whether I dream in color or black and white, I can go one better and report that in dreams I come in color."

A throaty little moan arrived from the Chicago end.

After lighting a candle on her dresser Joan undid her blouse and ran an open hand between her breasts. She asked, "So, angel, there was a clothing question?"

*****

On New Year’s Eve, Joan was alone at the barn, basking in the promise of a good day's training when Cailen called, less than twelve hours before she should be leaving Chicago. Lara had just phoned to say she'd had a change of heart and would drop by late that night to sign over her right to the house, which would give Cailen leeway to accept the first decent contract that came along. Lara even said she trusted Cailen to turn over her half of the sale price. Of course, Cailen had tried to inveigle meeting on another day, but Lara was inflexible. She would sign on New Year's Eve or not at all. The first call Joan received was not to cancel, but to discuss the possibility of postponing the start of their holiday together.

All through New Year’s Eve night, Lara strung Cailen along and caused so many delays that Cailen decided to forget about the contract and head for Louisville. But that didn’t even work, because her truck broke down two blocks from home - on New Year’s afternoon. Water had somehow gotten into the fuel tank.

It was clear their holiday plans had fallen through, and in the final, giving up phone call about the matter, Joan and Cailen had decided on comparative pain for dealing with their letdown. They were, after all, so lucky to have found each other. Whining about a brief delay not only lacked grace, it was childish, given the magnitude of true disappointment in so many lives.

"So let's buck up, little cowgirl. You sell that there house and git yerself back here as quick as you can, ya hear?"

"God, every accent you do is so terrible."

"Not. How about my British?"

"Please don't do it. Please. It's like a verbal walk across hot coals. All that ah-ah-ah."

"My tipsy Aussie, then. What about that one?"

"It sounds like your tipsy everything else."

"Now all this comes out. And after I've already told everybody we're engaged."

"Engaged? Who've you told that to?"

"Okay, nobody yet. But I was thinking the other day about how partner sounds like we really are cowgirls and I'm always tempted to pronounce it podna, and lover brings nudity and tongues to mind, and girlfriend is so froofy. Anyway, I thought fiancee would be good."

"But it isn't legal for us to marry, yet."

"Precisely. Fiancee makes a statement. Kinda assumes it's all just a matter of time, now don't it little lady?"

"Your John Wayne. It's not any good either."

"You recognized it, didn't you? Couldn't be that bad if you recognized it."

"Only because of the little lady. You always have him say little lady. Otherwise, somebody with flatulence, maybe a flatulent Aussie, would have been my first guess."


© 2006 Margo Moon