My best friend Starr Ann (hi, Starr Ann) can pick the oddest times to decide I need a cussin' lesson.
Here we are, down in Louisiana to heckle the government goofs who've flocked down here to take a bow two years after Katrina hit. The Goof-in-Chief is even down here, acting all concerned and buddy buddy.
Anyway, we were looking around the French Quarter, and I got to tell you, it doesn't look half bad. Then we swung around a corner a few blocks away and, wham! We stumbled into block after block of ruin. I mean it. There are places that still look like a hurricane went through yesterday.
First thing out of my mouth was, "What a pile of suck!"
Jodie cocked her head, and Starr Ann just did that exasperated sigh she does when I try to use an expletive and it falls out completely wrong and stupid. Starr Ann proceeded to explain to Jodie that I have what Starr Ann refers to as a 'dyslexic form of Tourette's Syndrome.'
I really can't help myself. Sometimes, just to make Starr Ann proud, I'll come bursting through the door meaning to be foul-mouthed, and say something like, "Ass, I had a fucky day." Starr Ann is usually so patient, and she calmly explains all the reasoning and nuance behind the fact that "Fuck, I had a shitty day" would have worked so much better. You get the picture.
So now, Jodie and Starr Ann have got their hearts set on working together to cure me.
Good luck to them on that.
In other matters, Starr Ann struck up a conversation in a restaurant last night with this woman who turns out to be a teacher at the very same 'rebuilt elementary school' where Our Mighty Leader is doing his scripted photo op this afternoon. Starr Ann just about has this fine lady talked into pulling a nice surprise on his Edumacated Highness if he comes by her classroom. The plan is to, in front of the cameras, where they can't really refuse, have the Leader of the Free World take a little vocabulary test right along with a group of second-graders.
What a confidence booster it will be to those young people to be able to say they got higher test scores than a President of the United States.